There aren't very many emotions, no matter how particular, that Christian Troy doesn't handle by sleeping with someone he shouldn't. Even though he's a plastic surgeon, don't doctors golf? Isn't that the old standby? As far as this character is concerned, there isn't a drizzle, much less a brainstorm, in the writer's room. Kimber has killed herself because she could never get Christian's full adoration, so this is feasibly one of the larger psychological problems that has come his way since this show started. Her death means nobody finds out about their last words after he almost died masturbating, so there's solace in that, but even in his own head, he's acting like he didn't completely destroy their relationship one last time.

Enter Melanie Griffith as Brandie Henry, Kimber's mom. You see the similar "ie" endings to the names? Mmhmm. She arrives at the beginning of the episode, as Sean, Christian, and Matt sit around in partial mope mode. Also, Matt's kid, So and So, makes his token appearance. Brandie is married to Les Overmeyer, an extremely obnoxious asshole played swimmingly by TV vet Robin Thomas. There is a little bit of hopeful conversation until Christian gets the untimely phone call announcing an end to the search for Kimber. So now all Brandie does is assure Christian he was loved immensely, and also worry about her appearance for a memorial service. Because Kimber would have wanted her to look her best. Let my former paragraph foreshadow the rest of this storyline.

Meanwhile, on the medical front, another guest star, Frances Conroy as Jane, makes a bananas appearance. Her monkey (sorry, chimp), clawed a Freddy's Nightmare across the face of the titular Sheila, her best friend. Jane takes all the blame for it; uncomfortably so, with one eye that stays smaller than the other in a creepy manner. In a popcorn-worthy moment, she shows a lot more emotion in a tear-flinging confession to murdering the attacking chimp. Sean sews her face up (it looked cooler as bloody triangles), and Jane over-indulges on complimenting Sheila. Then she soothes her by telling her waiting at home...(drumroll)...there's another chimp waiting!!! Of course everybody is horrified as Jane defends her wacky purchase. This is the kind of Nip/Tuck that I like the most, and with the most guilt. It's a plotline you're not going to find anywhere else, I'm betting.

So here comes the predictable. Sean tells Dr. Curtis Reyerson that he can't go to Africa, due to Kimber's death, but the two then plan on a later trip that Sean will get information on. Sean tells Christian they should vacation for a bit, and Christian tells Sean not to come back if he leaves. Sean has to get checked out by the med staff there. Turns out his doctor is Reyerson's wife, Sarah. Cutting to the chase: Sean and Sarah get drunk, end up at Sean's house innocently, where Sarah later arouses Sean from sleep with seduction, which Sean turns down. By the end, when Sean goes to talk doctor shop with Curtis, we find a soooo offended Sarah has told Curtis that Sean was the one who tried putting the moves on her. Curtis kicks him out, telling Sean he and Christian are a perfect match. Nail it on the head, guys.

Ugh, on Christian's side, he keeps seeing Kimber all over the place, particularly in her mom. Well, as her mom, in that over-played way. My problem with these scenes, ones where characters hallucinate other people saying exactly what's on their mind, is that their lack of movement for those moments is never questioned repeatedly by the other person, like I would do to someone if I caught them just staring at me in horror for ten to twenty seconds. This show is addicted to this kind of shit. Anyway, Christian walks into his house to find Les watching one of Kimber's porns, and Christian gets real upset and offended, cause that's just messed up. He does this as he constantly flirts with a Melanie Griffith who looks like half of her face took a Quaalude. He does it kind of sweetly at first, and then he ends up in bed with her. No surprise ending on this one. Not even one where it was just the wind, M. Night. You totally beat Nip/Tuck on that one. The show fades out on Sean and Christian having a drink, kicking back, and Christian talks about getting a house in the hills. What the fuck, man? I understand that I asked for a more toned-down Nip/Tuck, but this is getting to be shit trickling back uphill. Maybe they'll make Archer an hour long, or let Louis C. K. have two shows. Come on F/X, steal my ideas.

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