Oh, boy are things getting awkward on Galactica these days. Not only is the ship going through her very own identity crisis as she undergoes a Cylon-goop makeover, but half the main cast is having some kind of battleship version of Days of Our Lives drama, complete with crazed returned-from-the-dead wives, pregnant mistresses, returned old flames and a full-on bromance the likes this ship has never seen.

For serious, was Ellen Tigh not like one of those crazy soap opera ladies when she went to visit Caprica Six? And speaking of Sixes, can we get some new hairstyles and a wardrobe change or two on these girls? Were they just too lazy to get Helfer to change her outfit between takes because I had a hard time figuring out which Six was which. I couldn’t tell the difference between the Six who was all about leaving the fleet and Caprica. Same hair, same black outfit and lots of shots of her from the chest up, not allowing us to see the baby bump to confirm which Six we were looking at. A random Six or a significant Six? I’ve never really had a problem with that before but they usually make the other Sixes stand out. Even the one painting the goop on the side of the ship had the same hair. Whatever. I’ll try to keep it all straight for the purposes of this little recap.

Let’s start with Baltar, since his story’s fairly short. In a nutshell, he returns to his harem to find his ladies pissed off because he abandoned them and now armed and well stocked with food. They’re all about taking care of themselves now and while they’re willing to let Gaius back into his own cult, Paula appears to be running the show. When they go to one of the lower decks to do some trading, Gaius meets what I’m assuming is one of many of his children. Little Gaius Jr. and his mommy, whom Gaius clearly has no memory of sleeping with but is more than happy re-introduce himself to, is starving. So Gaius being the charitable guy that he is, decides to give some of his ladies’ collected food to the needy. He gets off on the rise of being generous and insists they’re doing the right thing until some random thugs show up with huge guns that trump the little hand guns the ladies have and takes what’s left of the food they brought.

Head-Six returns (yes!!!) to whisper in Gaius’ ear about regaining control of his women, who are now pissed that the food they worked so hard to get was stolen by some guys after they were talked into giving it away, which they didn’t want to do in the first place. Paula’s got the girls under her thumb but Head-Six gives Gaius the right words to inspire the women to see that his plan to feed the poor and carry bigger sticks than those thugs have is the best option. “Hooray for guns!” cheer the women and Paula realizes she’s defeated (for now). Gaius goes and somehow talks the Adamas into give him huge guns so he can help the poor. Seriously? Yes, seriously. Crates of guns are delivered to Gaius’ quarters. Everyone is happy, especially Paula, who looks pleased as pie to have herself a giant semi-automatic weapon. I smell trouble.

Now on to the other stuff. Ellen’s back! And though she was as calm as a pond on a windless day all throughout last week’s episode, we got a big swig of the old Ellen we knew and rolled our eyes at so often in the past, tonight when she returns to Galactica to find out that not only has Tigh been fraking some other woman, but that he’s in a full on relationship with Caprica, and that Caprica’s pregnant. Before she gets all of that information, she proves she’s still Ellen by drinking from Adama’s flask and then doing Tigh on a table the first chance they have to be alone together. Just as Tigh previously saw Ellen’s face on Six when they were going at it, it looks like the reverse is happening with Ellen. He sees Six when he looks at her just as she’s climbing on top of him.

After they do it, Tigh confesses about his relationship with Caprica. He doesn’t get to the part about the baby because Ellen gets all upset because Tigh’s doing one of their creations. She sees it as some sort of incest apparently. I guess she forgot about those steamy afternoons with Cavil back on New Caprica. Maybe it doesn’t count if you don’t remember who you are and you’re only doing it to get information out of the person.

A Six and an Eight bring Tigh, Chief, Tori and Ellen into Anders’ cell and propose that they all get the frak off Galactica and go start their own Cylon community sans humans. Chief and Tori are in. Tigh says no, going on what Anders’ told him last week about staying with the fleet. He also makes sure they all understand that Anders’ vote is to stay with the fleet too. So it’s up to Ellen to cast the swing vote. At first she’s not interested in leaving because Hera is with the fleet and she’s the only living chance at a future for the Cylons right now, seeing as according to what she knows, Cylons can’t procreate on their own. That’s when she finds out about Caprica and Tigh’s baby.

First she goes all soap-opera on Tigh and Six. She visits Tigh’s cell and has a creepy conversation with Caprica about her relationship with Tigh. She looks crazy enough to want to attack Caprica but she plays it cool and casually drops the bomb that she and Tigh got it on the second she got back to Galactica. Oops? Did that slip out? Her bad. Caprica looks sad at first but then Ellen tells her that Tigh loves her (Caprica) more than almost anything else. We’re meant to think that baby Liam is the only thing he loves more but later when she’s mad at Tigh she reveals that it’s Bill Adama Tigh loves more than anyone else. More then her, more than Caprica and even more than his own baby. I think we always knew she was a bit jealous over her husband’s bromance with his boss but it finally came out tonight.

The final five plus Caprica, random Six and random Eight meet back at Anders’ bedside to re-discuss their plans. Ellen’s on board to leave now but we know she’s just trying to stir the pot because she knows Tigh won't leave Adama and wants Caprica to see that Tigh hearts Adama above anyone else. Caprica, who’s been having pains in her abdomen after a fight she got into, collapses. Baby Liam is dying. Tigh is at her side and it’s clear he’s distraught about what’s happening. Meanwhile Caprica begs Cottle to cut the baby out even if it kills her but Cottle won’t do it. It’s too soon in the pregnancy and the baby won’t survive.

Ellen is holding Tigh’s hand and telling him to tell Caprica he loves her and tell Liam he loves him because that’s what they need to hear. Tigh doesn’t understand why he has to tell people he loves them. He doesn’t want to have to say it. Isn’t it enough that he feels it? He loves Ellen and Caprica and his baby. Ellen apologizes for going crazy on him. Then she tells Caprica that she’ll leave and Tigh will stay with her and the baby on Galactica and they’ll be a family. Then the baby dies. Cottle kicks Ellen and Tigh out of the room to do his job and we see Caprica crying on the bed.

Sixes have a tendency to go nuts when bad things happen to them. It should be interesting (and probably sad) to see what this miscarriage does to Caprica. Tigh’s not exactly emotionally stable either. At the end of the episode we see him hugging it out with Adama. He admits that the baby’s name was Liam, to which Adama responds by commenting on how Liam is short for William. Tigh claims it’s not like that but let’s face it… it totally is. It’s disappointing that Tigh and Caprica lost their baby. I don’t think we’ve ever seen Tigh so happy (sober) since he found out he was going to be a daddy.

Other things in the episode: We’re in wait-and-see mode on the status of Galactica. If the Cylon-Goop does its job and turns to cartilage or whatever, the ship will be fixed but who knows if that will happen. Even Chief doesn’t seem sure it will work or if the goop will respond the way it’s supposed to. And speaking of Chief, he’s got his own drama. Boomer’s back! She’s tossed in the brig and Chief goes to see her when she’s asleep on Kara’s advice. We know there’s a reunion coming there! Plus there’s his relationship with Tori. How long before the final five all get their memories back? Chief and Tori were once in love according to Anders. I have a hard time picturing those two together though but maybe it's because I like Chief and Tori's well... Tori.

Also, Roslin and Adama are both concerned with the blending of the Cylons among the humans. There’s fighting going on, including Caprica getting into a fight with some people when trying to get herself some food, which is probably what led to her pregnancy complications. That ties in a bit with what Baltar’s trying to do in making sure everyone gets fed. I’m wondering if whatever situation is brewing with his cult will directly affect what’s to come once we start seeing more Cylons on Galactica. And Roslin finds out that the Cylons have begun tacking up photos of the Cylons who have died since the alliance up on the memorial wall. It’s already starting.

And a random side note, it looks like Hoshi (Gaeta’s ex-boyfriend) has taken over Gaeta’s old job.

Since this was a fairly emotionally charged episode, let's end this recap on a lighter note by celebrating Tigh and Adama's guy love with this Scrubs/BSG fan video I found on youtube:

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