Tideland - Review

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Length: 120 min

Rated: R

Distributor: ThinkFilm

Release Date: 2006-10-13

Starring: Jodelle Ferland, Jeff Bridges, Jennifer Tilly, Janet McTeer, Brendan Fletcher

Directed by Terry Gilliam

Produced by Paul Brett, Peter Watson

Written by Mitch Cullin (novel), Terry Gilliam & Tony Grisoni (screenplay)

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Reviewed by Lexi Feinberg : 2006-10-03 22:12:48

Tideland is a movie so vile, pointless, and offensive, that it really ought to come with a warning label. It’s hard to believe that Terry Gilliam—the delectable mind behind Monty Python & The Holy Grail, 12 Monkeys, and Brazil—would want to attach himself to such an atrocious project. For those of you who thought The Brothers Grimm was his fall from grace, brace yourselves for how much farther he can descend.

There are countless misfires to mention in Tideland, but let’s start at the very beginning: Eight-year-old Jeliza-Rose (Silent Hill’s Jodelle Ferland) lives in a run-down house with her bohemian, junkie parents (Jeff Bridges and Jennifer Tilly). While she plays with 4 doll heads propped on her fingers and explores her overly grotesque imagination—a side effect from too many drugs in the womb, perhaps—her mother overdoses and, like a good little girl, she brings needles to her father so he can meet the same fate. Soon after they pick up and move to a deserted family farm on the countryside, he croaks from his “deep sea diving” vacation on the living room chair.

Jeliza-Rose is such a wacky child that she refuses to acknowledge her dad has died, even as flies swirl around his head like planets in orbit. Instead, she dresses him up with lipstick and blonde wigs, and proceeds to run around the house engaging in morbid games with her toys. Gilliam believes, mistakenly, that pointing a camera at a kid playing and shrieking for extended periods of time makes for an entertaining ride. If the solo activities aren’t grating enough—with her father rotting in the next room, no less—he decides to introduce a brain-damaged epileptic twenty-something (Brendan Fletcher) as a new playmate.

There are no stereotypes left unturned here: he runs around stuttering, hitting-his-head, and spewing inane things, like his belief that the local train is a giant shark that he must annihilate with dynamite. His daily adventures with Jeliza-Rose lead to an age-inappropriate, gag-worthy romance, where they decide to become “silly kissers.” There are several shots of them smooching, or coming close to doing more; it can’t get any worse, until his crazy mom (Janet McTeer) flaunts her knack for taxidermy by carving a massive hole into Jeff Bridge’s ribcage. “Someone dies, nothing has to change” she says, while his mangled corpse keeps them company at the dinner table.

Tideland is easily the worst movie of the year and arguably one of the worst movies ever made. There is no story here, just two hours of aimless, sordid events that find time to celebrate both death and pedophilia. This is not a movie—it’s an exercise in pushing boundaries way past the level of suitability and taking bad taste to unholy heights. Someone should ask Gilliam the same question raised in his masterful film The Fisher King: “Did you lose your mind all at once, or was it a slow, gradual process?”

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Andy S. Says:
January 2nd, 2008 at 18:42
You're review of Tideland is absolutely correct. No story, just 2 hours of sordid events. Thank you for summing it up so perfectly.

yogoshu Says:
March 1st, 2008 at 23:11
I disagree entirely - i thought this was an amazing, brave visionary film whose worth will most likely only be realized in years to come.

And celebration of pedophilia and death??? please! Was i watching the same film as you because i did not get that at all. The presence of challenging (even if the concepts are repulsive) aspects within a film should never translate as a death writ for the film in its entirety.

yes the film dragged a little in the middle but I don't think that warrants such venomous reviews as it has notched up.

And if you missed the story you were not paying attention enough, if its predictable narratives you desire then go rent a Schwarzenegger film

Ali Says:
March 17th, 2008 at 22:08
I, too, disagree. This is one of the few films that break away from the trend of rising action-conflict-conflict resolved-happily ever after.

The way the story is made makes it a lot more lifelike. The events that happen randomly make it much more suspenseful, and the wondrous mood of it makes it so much scarier than a regular run of the mill scary movie.

I think you have to use some imagination or will for curiousity to really understand and like what is going on; people who only enjoy logic and trail-beaten reality will probably hate it. I thought it was the best adventure movie I've seen in so very long. Hardly any movie tries to make you think or understand. I ended up watching it twice in one day, so my friend could see.

It really makes you explore what you would do in those situations, as harsh irony to what the girl really does. She uses her imagination to live and cope happily with all the crap

As for 2006, I can't remember any better movie than Tideland. Everyone else is just pumping out crap, and nothing is epic anymore or somehow memorable. Tideland was very memorable ( I mean what else was there, Disney's crash-and-burn Cars? That sucked )

So, in affect
To ridicule this movie is to hate yourself as a child and throw away what thinking was ever meant for

timC Says:
August 22nd, 2008 at 18:08
I totally disagree with your review, I personally think this movie is more closer to home than you realize. It represents your typical broken families, todays actual drug use, todays uncared for children, this was by far one of the best movies I ever seen. the child actress was one of the best I ever seen, the story format was excellent, I would rate this baby five stars. Climb out of your ivory tower and go into the real world and see what is really happening!

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Tideland - Review

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