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James Bond Probably Has Chlamydia After So Much Casual Sex, Doctor Says

Sean Connery as James Bond in Dr. No

James Bond is quite possibly the most iconic character in fiction. First created in a series of books by Ian Fleming, which have then been adapted into an equally popular series of films, that have far outlasted the books that spawned them, there's almost nothing James Bond hasn't done. There's also almost no one James Bond hasn't done.

The man has had an awful lot of sex, is what I'm saying. The "Bond Girl" is nearly as iconic as the man himself, and over the course of James Bond's history he has spent time with many of them. So many, in fact, that the man almost certainly has contracted a disease by now. Dr Sarah Jarvis, a general practitioner in the U.K. tells the BBC she would recommend Bond get tested, because he's almost certainly carrying something. According to Jarvis...

The likelihood of James Bond having chlamydia is extremely high. If he came to my clinic I would definitely advise him to have an STI test.

At this point, it's basically just math, right? James Bond has slept with so many different partners, and these are just the ones that we see him with in his life, that at some point he almost certainly had sex with somebody carrying a disease. The fact that having safe sex has clearly never been a concern only increases these odds.

Of course, it's not like James Bond is actually alone in the way that he acts. Lots of movie heroes have been more than willing to engage in casual sex. It's just that, because Bond has been around for so long. Prior to Daniel Craig taking the role the idea was that the character played from Sean Connery to Pierce Brosnan was understood to be the same man, so that entire sexual history was being applied to one person. That's over 50 women over the course of 20 movies. The number gets even higher if you include the Daniel Craig years.

James Bond's womanizing has been a much a part of his character as his gadgets and his Aston Martin. When Sean Connery first played the role in the 1960s it was the sort of thing nobody thought all that much about, but now, it's the sort of thing people are conscious of, even if fans suspend disbelief when watching the films.

One wonders if this idea is being taken into account in the newest James Bond movie. The still untitled Bond 25 will see the return of Madeleine Swann, played by Lea Seydoux, who first appeared in Spectre, the previous film. Perhaps we're seeing a modern James Bond take a somewhat more mature approach to his relationships by staying with somebody for more than a night.

Either that, or she gets killed by the bad guys in the first 10 minutes and Bond runs off to find somebody new. It's happened before.

Dirk Libbey
Dirk Libbey

CinemaBlend’s resident theme park junkie and amateur Disney historian. Armchair Imagineer. Epcot Stan. Future Club 33 Member.