A pilot with an entirely too long name—Don’t Trust The Bitch In Apt. 23—has picked up a character actor who also has a lengthy name, in this case, James Van Der Beek. According to TV Line, the official plan for the ABC pilot is to feature Van Der Beek as the neighbor of hometown gal, June, played by Dreama Walker and party girl Chloe, played by Krysten Ritter. Van Der Beek will be playing himself, although you’d think with a Krysten with a ‘y’ and a Dreama as legitimate first names, Don’t Trust The Bitch could be a real-name free-for-all.

Speaking of names, here’s another: Jason Winer is on board to direct Don’t Trust The Bitch In Apt. 23. Winer is most known for his directorial work on another ABC program, the popular and acclaimed Modern Family. With a name like DTTBIA23, I was a little skeptical to begin with, but we’ll have to see what someone with some serious chops can do with the material. Besides, unless they change the title, there’s a good chance the program will end up with something like $#*! My Dad Says.

Bitch or no Bitch, more Van Der Beek is better than no Van Der Beek, whose career has fallen to short and shoddy roles in the years after his Dawson’s Creek success. He’ll need some Neil Patrick Harris play-yourself magic to get out of his current slump.

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