I'm beginning to think every episode of this show takes two James Bond movies and smooshes them together to create the week's "A" plot. Bonus points to the person who correctly guesses which two films mixed to make this week's adventure!
We open in Berlin, as two well-coifed men kill some hospital personnel and make off with a psych patient named Mathias who has a hardcore jellybean fetish. Back in LA, the Blooms have just finished...making the earth move, and make plans for a big catering job meeting, because spying, apparently, doesn't pay the bills. It's all cutesy and there's French toast involved, but then their CIA boss Shaw shows up and it's pillowtalkus interruptus. Shaw informs them of a device that can blow the cover of every agent in the field, and the Blooms are on the case. They leave the big catering job (a funeral for a cute guy's stepdad) in the hands of little sis Lizzy and her "fabulous" coworker Lance. And with that, the Blooms are off to Berlin to chat up an informant...unfortunately, the informant chats up a bullet to the head, mid-conversation with Steven. Oops.
Back at the hotel, Sam explodes at Steven for getting their informant all kinds of killed, and then Hoyt steps in, comfortably clad (for him) in gold silk pjs that he uncomfortably (for us) exclaims makes him feel like he's wearing nothing. I hate this character. Hate. Anyway, via Sam's surveillance footage of the informant-killing snipers' getaway car, they track the assassins to a gentleman's club, which looks like a half-hearted, PG version of Showgirls. Leo meets up with Steven at the club, and while it's clear they hate one another, they perform a pretty effective buddy-team con on an arms buyer at the club, and suss out that this is the guy who's looking to acquire the device from our gun-happy, mental-patient-nabbing villains.
The team tracks the Germans to a building, inside which Mathias is being paid in jelly beans to crack the code on the device. Sam decides that the only way into the building undetected is a 20-floor climb up the outside of it, which is no problem to her since she's climbed K2 (!). Hoyt stays on the ground as the spies reach the top, and Steven does his best Cory Hart with some laser-sight-sunglasses-at-night which somehow help him fire a tranq-gun at a guard. Whatever. Hoyt hacks the security cams in the building and watches the exchange between buyer and seller...which goes south fast, as the Germans kill the buyers after collecting the money. The Germans run, there's a shootout with our team, and the bad guys escape...but they leave the device behind. Mission accomplished. Go team.
The problem, though, is that the device is a fake. Shaw's furious, and takes them off the case. In trying to figure out what went wrong, the Blooms review the tapes from Hoyt's hack and realize that Mathias is, in fact, the "device"--he's a math wiz with a bipolar disorder. Everyone schleps back to Berlin and sneak into the swanky mansion where the Germans are holding Mathias. Everyone poses as electricians and Leo has lots of questions about Steven's skin care routine. The less said about this, the better.
Mathias breaks into the CIA database and asks for his jellybeans back. The Germans are amazed, but everything's interrupted as the guards realize the mansion's been breached, there's a tussle, and Sam's captured. So, of course, Steven goes all Die Hard and kills a whole bunch of people until he finds and releases her. He takes out the Germans, but Mathias gets ahold of a gun. Luckily, Hoyt has some jellybeans of his own, and is able to diffuse the whole situation. Well, guess the writers found a use for that character. Good job.
Back in LA, Shaw gives 'em the espionage recap--the head German's in jail and his crime empire will fall, blah blah blah, and the CIA will be holding onto Mathias as an asset. Lizzy then gives them the catering recap, which involves her blowing the job due to an ill-timed hookup with the client. The job got done, but the Blooms ain't getting paid. Uh-oh.
One more kissy-face scene in bed and we're done. And while I had fun tonight, I'm frustrated. The highest-stakes thing in this show--an ADVENTURE SHOW--is the finances of the catering business. That's a problem. The stars are sexy, there's absolute chemistry, the show's slick and well-directed...but there's no long-term hook, yet. Gimme a big bad, and I'm happy. Or find a way to rope in a larger arc, and we're set.
Next week, we get a glimpse at the REAL reason the Blooms got called back into action--I'm hoping this is the beginning of the show realizing its promise.
Lemme know your thoughts, friends--see you in seven. Have a good week!
