They both come from Marvel, but Captain America and Deadpool could not be more different. One is a patriotic soldier with wholesome values, the other is a fourth wall-breaking nutcase whose life is filled with explosive shenanigans. So imagine how surprising it is to see a Captain America movie trailer edited to feel like next year’s Deadpool film, and even more surprising is that it actually works.
The YouTube account DailyAsgardianNews has put together a trailer for the Captain America movie we’ll never see, titled Captain America: The 95 Year Old Virgin. The clips, of course, are from Captain America: The First Avenger, The Avengers, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, and Avengers: Age of Ultron, but the tone, soundtrack, and even a few lines and sound effects are from the recently released Deadpool red-band trailer.
The Captain America trailer kicks off in similar fashion to the Deadpool preview, with Steve Rogers entering a facility to improve his body. The difference is that, unlike Wade Wilson, who joined Weapon X to destroy the cancer in his body, Steve is being injected with the Super Soldier Serum so he can serve in combat. Then they throw in “Shoop” by Salt-N-Pepa and “X Gon' Give It To Ya.” by DMX, and everything gets crazy.
The actions scene include Cap taking on HYDRA goons, throwing down with the Winter Soldier, and fighting Loki and the Chitauri. Since Captain America’s big screen outings have all been rated PG-13, the video throws in Deadpool’s “Motherfucker!” line while Cap is throwing his shield at the aircraft blocking his path. After all, it wouldn’t be a Deadpool movie without at least one f-bomb. Does that mean that Cap has to exclaim, “Language!” to himself?
Near the end we get more humorous moments, like Ultron commenting how he wish he could vomit at the sight of Captain America, and Black Widow and Cap kissing on the escalator to hide in plain sight and her later asking him if that was his first kiss since 1945, to which he replies, “I’m 95, not dead.” There are conflicting opinions on whether Steve Rogers has been with a woman yet, but considering what this movie is called, we’ll go ahead and let him keep his virgin status, giving him a 55-year lead on Steve Carell.
While it won’t be the raunch fest that Deadpool will be, fans can look forward to the Star Spangled Avenger’s next big screen outing in Captain America: Civil War, hitting theaters on May 6, 2016.