This Rotten Week: Predicting Incarnate Reviews
We've officially entered into the the post-holiday hangover phase of movies. After four flicks hitting the screen last week, all we've got this time around is Incarnate. Woof. It's gonna be a Rotten Week!
Just remember, I'm not reviewing these movies, but rather predicting where they'll end up on the Tomatometer. Let's take a look at This Rotten Week has to offer.
I made it 30 seconds into this trailer, and I was sure it was a spoof. Oh man, does this thing ever look bad. It had all the terrible cliches of the horror/someone's possessed genre while riding up dangerously close to the all out corniness and stupidity of the Scary Movie series. The effects are a mess (the kid's eyes glow red in the worst way possible), the scares are non-existent and Aaron Eckhart looks like he came straight out of central casting with a sign around him stating, "Down on his luck guy trying to look like an alcoholic with a past." Man does this ever look terrible.
Director Brad Peyton doesn't exactly inspire a great deal of confidence considering his other films include San Andreas (48%), Journey to the Center of the Earth (43%) and the coup de grace, Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore (14%). It all looks bad and if this finishes in the double digits on the Tomatometer I'd consider it a major win.
Recapping last week: Overall, a really strong week for the Rotten Watch with the scores hitting on three of the four flicks. First off, Moana (Predicted: 99% Actual: 98%) was a huge hit, joining the ranks of some other recent Disney wins like Frozen which have captured both the eyes of the critics and the wallets of moviegoers. I don't think it reaches the same heights, but this studio just continues cranking out the hits and this kind of critical reception is rarified air for sure.
Bad Santa 2 (Predicted: 23% Actual: 25%) was another win and looked pretty garbage-y right from the start. The first iteration made some nominal critical waves because it was different and Billy Bob Thornton was pretty damn unlikeable (in a good way) in the titular role. But going back to the well for the second time just never felt like it could work. And it didn't.
Then there was Rules Don't Apply (Predicted: 50% Actual: 57%) which basically split critics down the middle. The trailer seemed like the most vanilla thing imaginable with two Christians seeking love in the world of Howard Hughes' increasing dementia. This feels like a movie we will have totally and completely forgotten about forever next week.
And finally, Allied (Predicted: 75% Actual: 61%) was the one miss of the week and it didn't whiff by much. Critics agreed (mostly) that the movie looked nice (including the leads) but that was the long and short of it. There didn't seem to be much else there with more than a few referring to it as "empty".
Next time around we've got Office Christmas Party. It's gonna be a Rotten Week!
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Doug began writing for CinemaBlend back when Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles actually existed. Since then he's been writing This Rotten Week, predicting RottenTomatoes scores for movies you don't even remember for the better part of a decade. He can be found re-watching The Office for the infinity time.