Watch Natalie Portman's Dark And Weird SNL Sketch That Was Cut For Time

Saturday Night Live regularly draws upon some of the funniest folks in showbiz to host episodes, and the latest was headlined by none other than Natalie Portman. She starred in sketches that ranged from rapping about the Star Wars prequels to a Stranger Things Season 3 trailer spoof. The only unfortunate result of so many successful sketches is that some have to be cut for time. Luckily, SNL has released a dark and seriously weird sketch about dolls that didn't make it to air. Check it out:

Playing with dolls is all about kids learning to use their imaginations, right? Well, as this Saturday Night Live sketch points out, not all little girls who play with dolls imagine themselves as mothers someday. Instead of their lack of maternal inclinations barring them from playing with dolls, all they need is a special kind of doll to fit their needs. Some kids just want limited commitment to kids who aren't actually their own! If only "My Little StepChildren" existed in real life...

In this sketch, we see Natalie Portman playing a mom whose daughter just didn't connect with any normal dolls, claiming that she'd rather be be a "wicked stepmommy" who gets to be dramatic than a plain old mom who likes to nurture. Young Lisa's desire to marry a man with kids and then twist the kids' minds via passive aggressiveness, vague threats, and banishments to boarding school may seem troubling for a girl her age, but she's certainly not wrong that there's more drama in mind games than in tea parties. I say that as a former diehard fan of tea parties!

Lisa's dad doesn't seem quite on board with his daughter's love for drama and psychological games, but the heart wants what the heart wants, and Lisa's heart wants innocent minors to torment. Good for her for knowing what she wants and going for it at a young age! It's good practice for adulthood. Surely the wickedest wicked stepmoms need a headstart.

All things considered, "My Little StepChildren" could dominate a heretofore unexplored corner of the doll market. Every brand ranging from American Girl to Barbie to Bratz offers dolls and accessories that encourage kids to imagine themselves as caretakers; My Little StepChildren dolls and accessories would be something brand new. Just imagine shelves full of mini ornate chests of drawers ideal for hiding stepkids' legal documents being sold in toy stores!

In all seriousness, it's a shame that the "My Little Stepchildren" sketch had to be cut for time. Hopefully fans of Saturday Night Live and Natalie Portman will check YouTube to see the clip. It's definitely not one that should be missed. No wonder SNL posted it online!

Saturday Night Live is heading into a brief hiatus due to the Olympics taking over NBC's programming. When it returns, new episodes will air Saturdays at 11:35 p.m. ET on NBC. For more options of what you can watch on the small screen, swing by our midseason TV premiere guide.

Laura Hurley
Senior Content Producer

Laura turned a lifelong love of television into a valid reason to write and think about TV on a daily basis. She's not a doctor, lawyer, or detective, but watches a lot of them in primetime. Resident of One Chicago, the galaxy far, far away, and Northeast Ohio. Will not time travel and can cite multiple TV shows to explain why. She does, however, want to believe that she can sneak references to The X-Files into daily conversation (and author bios).