There are major spoilers here in this Key & Peele sketch, for Game of Thrones viewers who may not be caught up through the end of Season 4. That said, they’re absolutely the most hilarious spoilers you’ll ever see, and are a tad more on the nose than the Sesame Street parody from the other day.
If watching the plentiful deaths on Game of Thrones was ever too gory or shocking for you, there should be some kind of app on TVs or HBO Go that allows the offending scene to be replaced with a reenactment by the Valets. Just think of how much more comfortable Ned Stark’s death would have been had Sean Bean’s decapitation been replaced by this.
It’s not even just about the many deaths – Killt! Killt! Killt! Killt! – but the way that these guys view the deaths and these characters, from “Khal ‘Big Dave Navarros’ Drogos” to “Khaleesis” to “Tywon Lannisters.” If I felt that I could pull it off for the rest of my life, I’d get a huge back tattoo of “The Dinkles is my jam, my jelly, my peanut butter and my peanuts.” The Dinkles is everybody’s shit, fo sho.
I wish I could have been there when they discussed how to end the sketch. No choking to death on wine. No getting their eyes gouged out. Just a nice quick jump through the Moon Door that opens up in the middle of the sidewalk in front of the restaurant. Logical AND classy.
The Valets are two of my favorite Key & Peele characters, hands down. They personify everything that goes through my head when I get excited about something, but I don’t really have anyone to squeal over things with anymore. Still, I don’t even think I get this excited about Game of Thrones. Or Liam Neesons. Speaking of, check out their Non-Stop-infused sketch from last year.
Key & Peele, which last popped up for a Super Bowl Special on Comedy Central, will presumably be making its way back to comedy fans for a super-sized Season 5 this summer. Season 5 of Game of Thrones, meanwhile, will premiere on HBO on Sunday, April 12.