Previously: Carnage, and lots of it.

Mer VO: “At the end of the day, the experience of practicing medicine bears little resemblance to the dream.”

After a little tease about where we’re going to end up at the end of this week’s episode, we pick up where we left off last week—with everyone pretty much on the edge of death. Lexie is covered in Seth Green’s blood, Derek is elbow deep in Mary’s brain without a navigational system, The NAZI’s blood pressure is bottoming out, and Ray is still upside down in an ambulance. This is where we find out who will live and who will die.

Lexie is covered, and I mean covered in Seth Green’s blood. As he points out, she looks like Carrie after the prom. He seems to be doing alright though, considering the circumstances. They manage to call a nurse, who calls a code blue (even though it’s not). Sloan is still working on Dr. Hahn’s patient with the heart infection when he hears about Seth Green, so he leaves. Cristina is still helping Bailey with the NAZI when she hears about intern calling the fake code blue. They both rush out. By the time Sloan gets there, Lexie has managed to stop the bleeding. It’s only temporary, but Sloan is confident that they can get him to surgery in time to repair his carotid. They’re giving Seth Green some more blood and everything looks good for him, until he gives Lexie a goofy smile and tells her that he’s in love with her now. As this is following the Izzie/Denny storyline, he is definitely going to die.

Hahn gets called out of her surgery to help with Ray, whose heart is filling up with blood. She leaves Alex to finish up the surgery while she goes to help him. On the way out, Hahn proves once again how bad she is with people by not letting Izzie update the heart patient’s family. Once they get out to the ambulance bay, Meredith is still in the ambulance trying to save Ray. Hahn proceeds to have a very loud conversation with Izzie that basically outlines how screwed this guy is. Even after Meredith tells her to shut up, Hahn ends with, “get me an 18 gauge needle before his heart explodes in his chest.” Not exactly comforting words for the guy who’s 12 inches away from you and hanging upside down with blood pooling in his heart. In any case, Meredith gets the needle and manages to stabilize Ray enough for the firemen to get him out of the ambulance. Hahn is called away because her heart patient has taken a turn for the worse.

As soon as Hahn and Sloan leave, Alex starts closing the patient up and a huge geyser of blood erupts from the guy’s chest. I’m no expert, but that can’t be good. Apparently he cut the cable, but Callie says it wasn’t his fault. Sloan and Hahn come back in to save him. Unfortunately for Seth Green, this means that there isn’t a free OR available after all. Sloan tells Lexie and Cristina to transfer him into a sterile procedure room. They do, but he starts bleeding again and it looks like he has a stroke. Hey, isn’t that what killed Denny?

Meanwhile, the nearest tech that can fix Derek’s navigational computer is six hours away. Rose, however took three semesters of computer science before she went into nursing, so she thinks she can fix it. She diagnoses the problem, but her hands are shaking too much to connect the wires. Derek says his hands are steady, being a surgeon and all, so he goes over to help Rose connect the wires. Somebody’s got to keep the probe steady in the patient’s brain though, so naturally Derek picks one of Cristina’s sweaty, twitchy first-year interns. Because that makes way more sense than just having that dude go hook up some computer wires. They manage to get the computer working before the intern kills the patient though, so that’s a good sign.

Bailey’s marriage could use a good sign right about now, but all she’s got is a NAZI trying to die on her. Tucker is not happy about being kept waiting and Bailey is trying her hardest to finish up. She leans over and tells the NAZI that “A person can only rise so high,” while giving him a look that I’m honestly surprised didn’t melt his face right off. Bailey orders George to go out and tell Tucker that she’s almost finished and that she’s going to still be able to have lunch. George reluctantly goes, but Tucker is having none of it. He complains about how Bailey is always going to be done “soon,” and that she’s always saving a life. He’s done waiting, but he wants to stick around to tell her to her face. When Bailey hears about this, she handles it as you would expect: with an awesome Bailey monologue. She tells George to remind her husband that she took a vow to save lives and that he took a vow as well: for better or for worse. If he is thinking of leaving right now, he may find himself hurt or wounded and in need of an operation and he may not get a surgeon who is as married to her vows as she is. George just wants to do some charts. Poor George. George’s latest message pisses Tucker off even more and he basically says he’s done and leaves.

At this point, all of the surgeries go pear-shaped and everyone could die. Izzie and The Chief are trying to save Ray, but he’s sustained lung damage in addition to his heart damage. Hahn keeps repeating “you will not die” as she tries to save her heart patient. Derek is working his magic on Mary, but it’s not looking good. Worst of all, Seth Green is coding.

Ray is the first one we find out about. It seems as though he’s going to pull through. Meredith convinces Stan’s wife to be there with him, so neither of them is alone. When Bailey sewed the NAZI up, she made he swastika tattoo looks like a 5. It’s kind of hilarious, but Shane does not agree. After asking how Mary is doing, he tells George that he’s not the devil. He’s just a guy with a belief system, to which George replies, “since we’re sharing belief systems, I believe that if you were dead, the world would be a better place.” Whoa. Zing?

Hahn’s patient came through, but his wife is furious with Izzie for breaking her promise by not being there for them or keeping her informed. Cristina finds Bailey and tells her off for taking her off of Hahn’s surgery because of the color of her skin. She calls it an abuse of power, which it totally was. Mary came through okay, and Derek and Rose, of course, celebrate this fact by making out. It is Seattle Grace after all. Also, because it’s Seattle Grace, Seth Green doesn’t make it.

Now we’re back to the parts that they were showing us in the beginning of the episode. Meredith finally gets up the nerve and tells Derek that she doesn’t want him to date other people. She’s scared as hell to want him, but she doesn’t want to lose him either. Derek is looking at her with this heartbreaking look of pity and I actually feel bad for Meredith. She has this amazing ability to look like a kicked puppy sometimes.

Ava and Alex are back at Alex’s place. She’s worried about him. He had a really intense day and she wants to make sure he’s okay. He starts yelling at her about how she got him suspended for a week and she’s just playing dress-up, but he has a life. He tells her that he’s screwing Lexie and says if she can stop and be honest with herself for one minute, she’ll be able to admit that she didn’t come to talk to him…and then they make out. Alex really has some skills.

Lexie is having a hard time. Cristina tells her she did a good job and was brave. She’s having a hard time getting over the fact that he died because the hospital was not prepared. Cristina tells her that it happens sometimes, but they help more people than they hurt. I don’t exactly find that comforting.

Sloan and Callie are sitting together and decompressing. Hahn comes in and asks them out for a drink. Sloan is suspicious, but Callie explains that she’s looking for a friend, so Sloan agrees. Dr. Hahn asks him to promise not to hit on her, but we all know that he can’t promise that.

Cristina brings booze and Lexie home with her. Meredith is excited about one of those things. Luckily for Lexie, she came with a bag of limes, so Meredith begrudgingly lets her in. Izzie’s laying in bed and George comes in. She tells him that she’s never going to be Cristina or Hahn. They say I love you to each other and it doesn’t make me want to gag, probably because they follow this up with finally admitting that they’re not going to make this work. George doesn’t think it’s their chemistry (yes it is). It’s their timing (no, you were right about the first thing), so maybe someday they can be together (after the show is off the air). In the living room, Meredith, Cristina and Lexie are all dancing. This time Izzie and George join them.

Mer VO: “When you least expect it, the world rights itself again.”

This is our last episode for the foreseeable future, so happy holidays everybody. As a special gift, I leave you with what Barbara Walters was saying in her Justin Timberlake interview right as I started to write this recap:

“Two cocky young singers packaged their packages as Christmas presents.”

Thanks for that, Babs.

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