I Rewatched The Least-Talked About '80s Brat Pack Movie, And The Cringe Factor Is Through The Roof

In the 1980s, the Brat Pack was churning out hit after hit. One of the biggest was St. Elmo’s Fire, which in many ways is quintessential Brat Pack, with a bunch of members of that crew starring, like Rob Lowe, Demi Moore, Emilio Estevez, Ally Sheedy, and Andrew McCarthy. I haven’t actually sat down and watched the movie in decades, and when I did recently, I cringed through the whole slog. I mean, the whole thing.

It’s Hard To Pick The Cringiest Thing, But Emilio Estevez’s Plot Is Close

There is a lot to bristle at throughout the movie. The jokes are incredibly corny, and everything in the script is just so…basic. Deciding which is the most awkward subplot is tough, but the story involving Kirby (Estevez) stalking a woman he had a crush on, Dale Bieberman (Andie McDowell), is definitely in the running. It starts innocently enough, with the two running into each other for the first time in years at a hospital where Dale is a doctor. It goes off the rails completely from there.

First, Dale and Kirby go on an awkward first date that ends quickly when Dale has to run back to work. That’s after Kirby arrived at the restaurant hours before the date. It’s weird, but ok, I can buy it. Then it gets really uncomfortable when Kirby literally starts stalking her, following her to a party in the pouring rain. Still, for some reason, she decides she needs to take him back to her place to explain why a relationship wouldn’t work.

Kirby isn’t one to take no for an answer, and decides it’s all about money, and he takes a job with an entrepreneur to make some, seemingly ditching his dreams of becoming a lawyer. He throws a party at his boss's house. She doesn’t show, and Kirby tracks her own at a ski resort, presumably many hours away. It’s honestly disturbing behavior, and it’s not just because the ‘80s were a “different time." Why Dale didn’t call the cops like half a dozen times doesn’t make sense. Instead, she and Kirby kiss at the lodge and leave on good terms. Kirby should have been in jail. But, at least they don’t end up together.

The Plot Between Demi Moore And Rob Lowe

What is more in keeping with the 1980s is the scene between Rob Lowe’s character, Billy, and Demi Moore’s, Jules. After Kirby’s party, the two drunkenly make out in a car, and Billy comes very close to a straight-up sexual assault. I get that Billy is the “screw up” of the group and that drugs and booze have messed him up, but in a real-world situation, I don’t quite understand how Jules would ever speak to Billy again after the encounter. She might have even filed charges.

Yet… they stay friends. I don’t know if it’s simply unrealistic or disturbing. Or both. ‘80s movies are notorious for scenes like this that didn't end with realistic consequences (yes, people understood sexual assault in the ‘80s). The worst part is that once Jules’ life falls apart at the end, it’s Billy who saves her, and the only one she’ll listen to after she attempts the most bizarre suicide ever by freezing to death. What’s worse is that after all that, Billy ends up basically begging Wendy (Mare Winningham) for what can only be described as pity sex, and it works. It’s all pretty gross.

Even The Realistic Stuff Is Cringy

One subplot involved Billy’s relationship with Wendy. Wendy is the naive one in the clique, and she is struggling with finding her way in the world. Her old-fashioned father treats her like young women were often treated by the older generation, even in the ‘80s. He wants her to quit her job, get married, and start having kids. That is actually pretty realistic, and yeah, by modern standards, it’s super cringe, as the kids would say.

The most realistic subplot in the movie involves the love triangle between Alec (Judd Nelson), Leslie (Ally Sheedy), and Kevin (Andrew McCarthy). Even that ends in a pretty uncomfortable way when Leslie breaks up with Alec amid his numerous infidelities and hooks up with Kevin. The sex scene is pure cringe. Even that whole thing ends weirdly with Alec and Kevin accepting that Leslie loves both of them, but can’t be with either.

Oh! And that’s not even mentioning the cringy subplot that involves Jules thinking Kevin is gay and trying to set him up with her interior designer, Ron. Now that is the kind of ‘80s subplot that the world has moved on from. Oof.

It Still Ends On A High Note

The kicker is, at the end, they decide that they all still love each other. After all they have been through, the debauchery, the betrayals, and the borderline sexual assaults, they somehow stay best friends. I like happy endings, but this one is just too saccharine even for me.

The only thing that seems to have changed is that instead of hanging out at St. Elmo’s (the bar where they were regulars), they start hanging out at Houlihan’s. I honestly don’t know if it’s supposed to be a joke. Remember, Houlihan’s was kinda hip among the yuppies in the ‘80s.

The other thing that I think made this movie a hit both then and with people who still love it today is the soundtrack. It’s a banger, filled with some great ‘80s tunes, many of which have stood the test of time. It’s the soundtrack of my early life, and I have nostalgia for it, so I’ll always love it. Yet again, though, there is even a cringe factor to the music, toying with emotions the way it does.

There are plenty of Brat Pack movies from the ‘80s that get talked about both for their good and bad points, movies like Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, and Pretty in Pink, but fewer people seem to talk about St. Elmo’s Fire, which is the most dated of them all.