About those Punisher 2 rumors… don’t buy the lies. Or maybe you haven’t heard. Aint-It-Cool-News, the internet's most visited rag of unreliability, is claiming that Thomas Jane has confirmed a sequel to the loathed, hated, and completely failed box office turd The Punisher. Always quick to raise the fanboy, comic nerd flag, they’re of course only to pleased to trumpet this as some sort of justification of the horrible first Thomas Jane outing. Allow me to pull the emergency break.
Aside from the fact that everyone hated the movie (including Harry Knowles, though he’s quick to backpedal on that now) and that it was a huge financial disaster, why shouldn’t they make one right? Ok, I think I just answered that question.
But, as sequel proof, AICN offers a report from the Dallas Comic Con this past weekend in which Jane claims to have shot a teaser for the film in a North Dallas Studio. Dallas is my home turf, so let me clue you in on a few things. First, Thomas Jane shows up on Dallas radio a lot. Six months ago he was here on Dallas radio with a similar line, claiming that Punisher 2 was happening and that he was going to be in it. He’s been claiming that since even before the first Punisher crashed and burned and has only shouted it louder since the film’s complete box office and critical decimation. In fact, I heard him on the radio here in Dallas just this past Friday, pimping the Dallas Comic Con and yes, jokingly (it’s really hard to tell with the guy) claiming that he would be doing a Punisher 2 yet again.
One of the things I really dig about Thomas Jane whenever I see him interviewed is that the guy is a goofball. A few months ago he did a local interview here where he spent the entire thing hinting at being incredibly stoned. Actually, maybe that wasn’t a joke. He may say he’s doing a Punisher 2, but there’s no way you can take that as gospel.
But, he’s filming a teaser at a North Dallas studio right? Oh yes, he must be talking about the studios in Las Colinas, a place where they shoot nothing but Cheerios commercials and straight to video garbage that usually never sees the light of day. If he’s shooting anything for Punisher 2 there, you can bet that it’s not a major studio project. You’re looking at a straight to video flick that’ll sit comfortably on the bottom shelf at Blockbuster.
Let’s hold off on the Punisher 2 pronouncements shall we? Yes, Thomas Jane has been claiming they’re doing another, but logic suggests that there’s no studio in the world stupid enough to finance such a heinous, unloved, unwanted project when they’re guaranteed a big, gigantic loss. You’d be better off funding a Catwoman sequel, or getting behind the next movie from Tom Green. People hate The Punisher, and no amount of fanboy wishing is going to change that.
