TV Recap: Ugly Betty - The Sex Issue

If last week’s Ugly Betty was all about the love, this week is most definitely all about the sex. Hilda and Archie, Molly and Daniel, Wilhelmina and…well, she’s hit sort of a dry spell, and of course, Betty and Matt. Only, not so much Matt. Poor Betty, she thought she landed the guy. Maybe she can use whatever tips are in Mode’s first ever sex issue to help seduce him.

Matt and Betty are going strong so it’s only natural that one night, she slaps on a little lip gloss and is ready to stay at his place. One little problem, when she makes it clear what she’s after, he hustles her into a cab and sends her home. Betty can only figure it’s her so Amanda and Marc try to work their magic and make her sexy. A weird little montage later and Matt arrives at her old place ready to go out. Betty, though, is not so ready. She has soft music playing, candles lit, and she comes out in some strange silk robe/jumpsuit thing. Matt, again, freaks out and leaves the apartment with absolutely no explanation.

The only thing Betty, Amanda, and Marc can figure is that he’s a virgin or something. Betty decides not to wait to find out and goes over to see Matt on his lunch break, though he said he was working through lunch. Naturally, the other two come along and are there to spot little Matt leaving work and meeting up with a woman. Oh, relax, he’s not the type to cheat. In typical TV fashion, Marc and Amanda push Betty from her hiding space and she is forced to confront Matt and this woman, who turns out to be his therapist. Why does he need a therapist, you ask? Well, our little Matt is very far from a virgin. He’s had loads of women because when he was younger and alone, he used sex as a way to connect with people. Only it never really worked and he made a pact with his therapist that he wouldn’t have sex again until he really felt that connection with some one. He just freaked since it’s been a while. See, he likes Betty just how she is.

Of course, now Betty’s freaked out. Personally, I don’t think anyone who can’t say the word sex (even to Amanda or Hilda) after they’ve done it repeatedly is really mature enough to handle a sexual relationship but whatever. She doesn’t even want one now because every woman she sees, she pictures with Matt. Oh the drama. It must run in the Suarez family because Hilda is one drama-laden girl, too. She’s dating Archie but he’s just too nice for her. He calls her to tell her sweet things and always holds the door for her. I know, so boring. She decides she’s going to break up with him because she just can’t take the niceness anymore. No, seriously.

When she’s about to have the talk with him, though, his ex walks up and interrupts them. She then proceeds to sit with them and repeatedly say how she’s so stupid for letting Archie get away. She even gropes him under the table. Naturally, this brings out Hilda’s jealous side and instead of breaking up with Archie, she takes him back to her house for a go in the salon chair (don’t worry, Ignacio and Justin are on a camping trip for the weekend). Surprisingly, Hilda actually enjoyed herself but then Archie had to go and say he thought she was going to break up with him. And Hilda actually agreed and told him she only wanted him after the ex showed up. Dear god, shut your mouth, crazy. He storms off and both the Suarez girls are alone again.

Another woman feeling lonely is the lovely Wilhelmina. She keeps having these dreams of Connor standing in the living room, singing to William. They keep her up so much that she’s actually fallen asleep at a Mode meeting. Thinking she needs more than just sleep, Marc not only hires the night nanny she requests but makes him a gorgeous model who can help with more than just the baby. Though, he doesn’t seem that interested when Willie tries to seduce him. Right on cue, he starts singing to William and Willie breaks down crying. The nanny tells her that instead of looking for sex, she needs to find a way to get closure on Connor and focus on William. Wow, smart model/nanny. How come nannies are always really intuitive? She fires him, of course.

So Willie, Hilda, and Betty are all alone. At least the latter have each other. Betty is able to convince Hilda that she should try a nice guy for once and Hilda is able to convince Betty that with her, sex with Matt will be special. Oh, sisterly love is so sweet. Before Hilda can tell Archie how she feels, the ex shows up to claim her guy. A little fight ensues which is, shockingly, exactly when Archie shows up. He gets rid of the ex and Hilda apologizes for what she said earlier. Yay, they end up all happy.

Hilda’s not the only one meeting up with her boy. Betty goes to Molly’s poetry slam (it’s something she’s always wanted to do) to meet up with Matt. Speaking of Molly for a second, though…she and Daniel are truly in love and he supports anything she does. Until she gives him her poem to read and he lets Betty read it. She tells him it’s about them together and he freaks out and tells her not to read it in public. This time, in typical Betty fashion, Betty shows Daniel that he’s being a coward and he tells her to read her original poem after all. Daniel pushes Betty in Matt’s direction and they all go home happy. Literally. Betty and Matt practically skip into his apartment.

To end on an even better note: Daniel had confessed to Molly that he was in an awful high school rock band and he was so bad he was booed off the stage. In a gesture of no secrets, he shows her a mullet sporting, guitar holding picture of himself. Are they really not going to kill her off? There have only been about 4 happy episodes for Daniel. Really?