Chuck Norris tragically passed away at the age of 86 last week, and left behind a family, legions of fans and a legacy that included acting, martial arts charity initiatives, his own production studio, and even (apparently) teaching young folk about acting. That’s what happened to Jessica Simpson after trying out for (and losing) a spot in The Mickey Mouse Club, unlike her peers Britney Spears and Ryan Gosling. She went to Chuck Norris for help, and said he gave her some advice that’s cemented in her brain, and has actually ruined Denzel Washington movies for her.
Jessica Simpson has famously told the same story several times about her mom sending her "to Chuck Norris" and how it scared her away from Denzel Washington movies for life. The first appeared in print in Open Book, her autobiography that's currently available on Amazon. Another time, she told a very similar story during an episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live! In her narrative, she’s a young 12-year-old girl who is working on her acting after losing the Mickey Mouse Club gig.
He was my acting coach and he was, you know, a little tough. … Basically, he said I had too many expressions on my face.
This would have been in the early '90s just before Walker, Texas Ranger blew up, and the actor was apparently teaching some young talent in the Dallas area. In fact, the actor who played Barney The Dinosaur ended up being Jessica Simpson’s scene partner. Per Chuck's logic, the reason Ms. Simpson didn’t beat out her peers had to do with her face, and he suggested she pay attention to what Denzel Washington was doing on the big screen. In Open Book, she wrote:
Article continues belowHe didn’t wait for me to answer, he just turned and grabbed a roll of green Scotch tape. ‘Denzel can say anything without moving his eyebrows,’ he said. ‘So, Jessica, I’d like to try something.’ He pulled out a long strand of tape and stuck it across my eyebrows to tape them tight.
Simpson claimed she continued to be taped up when she would dutifully appear for classes, and by the third visit, she was already telling her mother she didn’t want to go. Her mom had little sympathy.
‘You have to,’ my mom said. ‘If you wanna do this thing, you have to go in there and do these classes.’ She had to drag me out of the minivan in tears, but that third time was the last time. I don’t want to make a big deal about it, and I wish Chuck Norris and Barney the best, but I will say the experience ruined every single Denzel Washington movie I’ve ever seen since. I just watch his eyebrows the whole time, waiting for them to move.
To his credit, Norris is a remarkably stoic actor himself. Plus, it's true that eyebrow acting can be a problem. We know Martin Scorsese allegedly hates “eyebrow acting,” so it’s not like Chuck Norris’ advice is bad advice. Though I’d argue in certain situations, like The Rock in the WWE ring or like when Jimmi Simpson’s eyebrows needed a tweak in Westworld, one’s eyebrows can be rather important to the gig. Still, clearly the whole taping thing was mortifying to 12-year-old Jessica Simpson, and is a fundamental story in her coming-of-age narrative. I didn't see the random Denzel Washington shrapnel coming, but it's still a fascinating story.
Norris left a lasting impression on Jessica Simpson, but his impact didn’t always have to do with eyebrows. Christie Brinkley revealed their longtime partnership (despite disagreeing politically) and the respect she shared with the late star. Other big Hollywood names like Sylvester Stallone and Jean-Claude Van Damme paid tribute to Norris, and fans have been leaving memorabilia on his Hollywood star. He won't be forgotten anytime soon, even if everyone's experience really seems to have run the gamut.
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