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Joss Whedon is being well-compensated by Marvel. Of that, we can be sure. Once it was confirmed that he’d be back at the helm for The Avengers 2, though, rumors started circulating about how “well” Whedon was doing at Marvel … financially speaking. The number floated around the Internet (by “reputable” sites like Deadline) say Whedon’s earning close to $100 million though his Marvel deal. Which is insane, even when you factor in Whedon’s obvious role as a creative mentor on additional projects like ABC’s S.H.I.E.L.D. program and features such as Thor: The Dark World and Captain America: The Winter Soldier -- movies that will have some impact on his Avengers sequel.

But Whedon is likely not making $100 million from Marvel, and he took to his fan site, Whedonesque, to poke holes in this rumor (and other rumors) with an amusing post. Here it is, in full:

Hi guys.

I was going to let it slide, but I've got this sour taste in my mouth. (Mmmm, lemonade!). Some facts are not facts. I'm not going to go into the whole thing, but jeepers, I'm not getting $100 mil on Avengers 2. If I were, I would come on this site and laugh and laugh and laugh. I'm not making Downey money. I'm making A LOT, which is exciting. I'm not pretending to be a poor farmer, an Everyman, an ANYman. But that number is nuts. A few other things about me that have been "reported" that people should take with a grain of salt:

That I throw wild Hollywood parties where everyone is naked and dancing and wild and I remember to serve enough snacks.

That I can get a movie greenlit by sighing and staring into the middle distance.

That I ate a unicorn and made it winter for three years.

That I "can write."

Well, that's a load off. Sorry to get so personal -- the whole thing's a bit tawdry. But honestly, it bugged me. I'm off for a nice juicy steak. There's a place downtown that does it with rosemary butter, it tastes just like unico -- like a steak.

BYE-ee! J.

“I’m not making Downey money” is my favorite quote from that … at least, my favorite quote that doesn’t conjure images of Whedon eating unicorn meat somewhere out in Los Angeles. And it’s fantastic that Whedon will take to a message board run by his fans to deflate the notion that he’s “Big Time,” even though he and generations of his relatives likely are set for lifetimes.

But this merely distracts from the ongoing financial problems Marvel’s running into as they negotiate with current cast members to keep the “team” together for as many sequels as possible. There’s always the option to recast, if Marvel wants to price out the actors who helped them reach this level of popularity. Allow me to make one suggestion: Get Sarah Michelle Gellar in the Black Widow suit. If Joss makes that happen, he’ll actually earn $100 million … if not more than that.

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