Sony Opts To Make Spider-Man Reboot Even More Terrible

I think Cinema Blend has belabored the idea that rebooting the Spider-Man franchise is one of the worst ideas since invading Iraq. But Sony is just making it too easy for us to thrash them for their continually poor choices.

Hollywood Insider has just released an article saying that Sony will be looking for a more contemporary, grittier look for the re-imagining of the webbed hero's origin story. What that means to you is that this reboot will just be Spider-Man 1 (a fucking origin story) painted over with a Dark Knight look and feel. What's even more earth-shatteringly idiotic is that they're shopping the director position to people who have made decided un-gritty movies. Marc Webb for example. Because (500) Days of Summer is the definition of “grit.” It's the grittiest film I've ever seen... on opposite day.

Also having expressed interest in the job is Michael Bay, which tells me that Sony doesn't quite get the difference between “action” and “grit,” since his movies are all really shiny and “Miami.” Sony's decision as a whole is baffling, but these new developments seem even more ridiculous than rebooting a seven-year-old franchise. I think we can officially take out our trumpets and play Taps to commemorate the death of the Spider-Man franchise. It won't be coming back from this.

Does anyone else think that aside from just being childish towards Sam Raimi that Sony is only rebooting the series so they can take another shot at Venom, which they so unceremoniously fucked up in Spidey 3?