Do you guys remember a simpler time, when consumer goods came in only one or two different versions, and radical innovations didn’t seem necessary? Well nobody at Syfy or microbudget production company The Asylum seems to remember those days. Syfy has already given the green light to the presumably ludicrous sequel Sharknado 3 a full three months before Sharknado 2 comes around and barely attracts an audience, despite a strong Twitter presence. Hasn’t the real weather already been bad enough this year?
Via a press release, Syfy and The Asylum wore their gimmicky intentions on their sleeves by making it clear the whole point of this sequel is to take the action to a different city, which is no surprise, since the only thing that Sharknado 2 is accomplishing is moving the characters from Los Angeles to New York. (And then destroying New York through terrible CGI.) I hope you like mysteries, because they’re not releasing where Sharknado 3 will take place just yet.
If I had to take a guess, I’d say the most fin-tastic weather phenomenon on Earth will hit New Orleans during Mardi Gras, or perhaps a heavily populated football game in Miami will be the next target. Dare we even consider what this series might accomplish if it ever makes it into Europe? Seeing a shark get impaled on the Eiffel Tower is an image too strong to stay contained in just one person’s mind!
In case you’ve never actually seen Sharknado before, it basically focused on Ian Ziering’s Finley Shepherd and Tara Reid’s April Wexler trying not only to merely survive a deadly shark attack crisis, but they also try to figure it out. Despite popularity on social networks, the movie still received low ratings when it debuted, so there’s a good chance you never actually watched it. If that’s the case, this highly condensed video below will clue you in on everything you missed. Namely, sharks!
Sharknado 2, which premieres on July 30, reunites Ziering and Reid as New York City becomes plagued by blood-hungry, high velocity sharks. The explosive stunt casting for this flick might be enough to bring a few eyeballs to TVs. You can expect this sequel to feature appearances by Andy Dick, Vivica A. Fox, Judah Friedlander, Judd Hirsch, Kelly Osbourne, Robert Klein, Salt-N-Pepa’s Pepa, Perez Hilton, Biz Markie, Kurt Angle, and Mark McGrath. Impressive, no? Check out one of the first stills below.
Syfy plans on airing Sharknado 3 in the summer of 2015, making this the most painfully amusing yearly tradition since my family decided to put a halt to Lights Off, Pants Off Christmas dinners.