Watch Agents Of SHIELD Characters Promote Coke In WTF Chinese Commercials

Not sure if you’ve heard, but China is big business. The nation has become a massive market for western products and for western media. They’re also willing to pay western celebrities giant piles of money to appear in TV commercials. They’ve been doing it for decades, it wasn’t until the advent of the internet and YouTube that US audiences ever saw what our favorite celebrities were doing overseas. For these reasons it’s not surprising that these ABC's Agents of SHIELD stars are doing commercials for Coca-Cola overseas. What is surprising is the ads themselves. They make absolutely no sense.

In the first of two fever dream hallucinations that pretend to be soda commercials Chloe Bennet is being interrogated by somebody who then turns out to be working with her and helps her escape. Wait, what? He’s holding her captive, no, wait, just kidding, he’s there to rescue her. Whatever. In another ad, Brett Dalton receives his secret orders from a man in a polar bear costume. No, really:

Both ads jump between (Mandarin?) Chinese and English so only some of the commercial is understandable, while both are utterly incomprehensible. We understand that the polar bear is a Coca-Cola mascot, but why is there a guy who looks like a minor league sports mascot giving Brett Dalton spy orders? That can’t be an efficient way to keep your identity secret. And while we’re on the topic, couldn’t they have mic’d the suit better, or over dubbed the polar bear’s dialogue so he’s easier to understand? Sloppy, just sloppy.

While these are ostensibly advertisements for Coke, they are also ads for the Wizard World Comic Con taking place this weekend in Guangzhou, China. Bennet is in attendance as a Special Guest. Dalton is not, though it’s possible he was planning on attending when the ad was filmed and had to drop out afterwards.

It's barely possible that the parts that are in Chinese would clear everything up. Maybe the exchange between Bennet and her captor/handler makes sense if you know what they're saying to each other. Although it does not explain why she can't just take the damn Coke with her and drink it later. Do you have any idea what they’re saying? We’re dying to know what Dalton’s secret spy phrase is. If you can translate please do so in the comments.

Dirk Libbey
Content Producer/Theme Park Beat

CinemaBlend’s resident theme park junkie and amateur Disney historian, Dirk began writing for CinemaBlend as a freelancer in 2015 before joining the site full-time in 2018. He has previously held positions as a Staff Writer and Games Editor, but has more recently transformed his true passion into his job as the head of the site's Theme Park section. He has previously done freelance work for various gaming and technology sites. Prior to starting his second career as a writer he worked for 12 years in sales for various companies within the consumer electronics industry. He has a degree in political science from the University of California, Davis.  Is an armchair Imagineer, Epcot Stan, Future Club 33 Member.