I don’t usually do this, but OMG OMG OMG!!! There are few times in one’s existence where a beloved movie will find new life after decades of dormancy, and there’s almost never the original creative team and star not only intact, but seemingly better than ever. Ladies and gents, without further a-deadite, here’s the outstanding first full-length trailer for Ash vs. Evil Dead.
Hot damn, this looks like the best thing to hit TV since color. (The blood red kind.) We knew things were going to look amazing after we first saw Bruce Campbell all chainsawed-up as Ash, but this trailer seriously took things beyond the television pale and into some truly outlandish places.

Like, say, Ash in a girdle.

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It looks like Ash, despite working a regular man’s job at the Value Stop, has somehow messed up and conjured some of the world’s most evil beings back to life. And his gorgeous smile can’t stop them! And rather than taking everything on by himself, he decides to enlist two of his coworkers to help him destroy the things that want to destroy the world.

There’s Dana DeLorenzo’s Kelly Maxwell, who doesn’t seem like she really wants to be in the position she’s in, but then the trailer doesn’t spend too much time on her. We do get to see Ray Santiago’s Pablo Simon Bolivar, who seems equally non-confident about what he’s doing, even when he’s got a sharp ass broken bottle to fuck some throats up with.

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We also get to see a couple of other characters popping in, including the always amazing Lucy Lawless as Ruby, who is hunting down the cause of the deadite outbreak. There’s also Jill Marie Jones as state trooper Amanda Fisher, who is also into stopping the threats. And, of course, there’s the return of his chainsaw hand and Ash’s shotgun, along with that superb sense of humor.

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This is fucking brilliant. We didn’t really need a major reminder that the original trilogy’s writer/director Sam Raimi was behind it, but we still get some sweet-ass clips from his former masterworks. There’s no way that someone can possibly say that a second film remake would have been better than this. I’m not even sure a big screen Army of Darkness follow-up would have been better, but maybe I’m just drunk on boomstick wine. My heart is jackhammering. Phew.

Ash vs. Evil Dead will make its wondrous debut on Starz on Saturday, October 31. This will be the best Halloween ever.

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