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Yesterday and today, we're bringing you absolutely everything Oscar. The Best, the worst, the speeches, and the screw-ups. It's my job to bring you the best GIFs from last night, the ones that captured the spirit of last night's event for better and worse.
On the red carpet they had Kristin Chenoweth interviewing the stars, which was sort of surreal. I know she's teeny (4'11'' according to IMDB), but they could have given her an apple box to stand on or something. She made everyone next to her seem enormous! I imagined PR people frantically steering their tiny—but not Chenoweth teeny—ingénues away from Chenoweth's House of Mirrors interviews.
Tommy Lee Jones got the memo about his Golden Globes grumpiness. Determined not to be a meme a second time. He was downright jolly last night! Samuel L. Jackson was another story.
It became clear very early on that the Academy Awards heard the outcry about the lack of musical numbers at last year's ceremony. So what did they do? They overcompensated by shoving one musical number in after another, including the loathsome "We Saw Your Boobs," or as it was called at the Oscar party I went to "Mr. Skin: The Musical." Cheers to Naomi Watts for playing along. I guess.
Still, amid all the musical frenzy, this moment between Charlize Theron and Channing Tatum was glorious.
Jokes about actresses with eating disorders, Jews running Hollywood, a Nazi cameo, and random allusions to one of MacFarlane's childhood touchstones, it was basically exactly the kind of humor I expected from The Family Guy creator. Here's a moment of it that nicely reflects my reaction at home.
But hey, Quvenzhané Wallis was adorable, and born to be a meme.
One of the surprise wins last night went to Quentin Tarantino, who scored the Best Original Screenplay Oscar for Django Unchained. From his leather tie to his flustered excitement and this daffy sign off, Tarantino was true to himself. Congrats!
Twitter exploded when it seemed Renée Zellweger couldn't read, having twice shied away from the envelope. My guess, she needs glasses that probably didn't go with her dress. But it's cool, Queen Latifah's got her back.
Then came Jennifer Lawrence's big moment, and true to J-Law fashion she was fabulous and a bit of a mess. This fall will be a part of her story—and Oscar's—forever, but she was totally lovable in it.
And cheers to Hugh Jackman and Bradley Cooper, who both darted in to try to save the day.
I admit, I was getting drowsy by the time we got to Best Picture. And since the popular pick for this was Argo, I wasn't expecting any more surprises. Enter FLOTUS! First Lady Michelle Obama brought some class back to the Oscars after so much frat boy shenanigans from MacFarlane, and made many viewers—myself included—freshly thrilled for this final announcement.
And then, rather than going out on Ben Affleck's exhilarated and touching speech, we go out on the promised final song number, a totally energy-sucking roast called "Here's to the Losers." With lyrics like "To the disappointed actors wondering what they dressed up for. Now the real performance start, with phony smiles at the ball. Here's to the losers, bless them all," this song ended the 85th Annual Academy Awards without a single iota of class.