Bad news men. Prepare to be sexually frustrated. Lindsay Lohan and Keira Knightley are set to star in a new movie with lesbian undertones. Undertones almost always means nothing will actually happen.

MTV says The Best Time of Our Lives is about Welsh poet Dylan Thomas and his wife Caitlin caught in a machine gun/hand grenade driveby, but when talking about the film with the musicless music television channel Lindsay seems more interested in potentially making out with her co-star Keira Knightly. Lindsay plays Caitlin and Keria plays her friend and wife of the man who blows up their house. Lohan told MTV, "[Keira] is older than me, but she kind of has a mysterious relationship with my lover… And then there's somewhat of a lesbian undertone."

Maybe I'm focusing on the wrong things here. Sorry, it's very distracting.

The real story here is that Lindsay and Keira are doing something serious for a change, a movie about one of the 20th Century's most celebrated drunken poets. The movie will explore what in Dylan and Caitlin's life led them to the middle of an explosive maelstrom and should contain at least a little on screen binge drinking from whoever ends up playing Thomas.

Normally I'm not keen on movies about poetry, let's face it… poetry is boring. But this one features sweet sonnets, alcoholism, implied girl on girl action, and hand grenades. Sounds like a good time at the movies to me.

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