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Of all the questions that Star Wars fans are currently contemplating, the greatest of them all is this: What happened to the Ewoks? Ok, so maybe that's not the question that people have been dying to know the answer to, and yet, it's an answer we now have. A new Star Wars novel now says that in the events following Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, some Ewoks volunteered to help out the rebellion in an unexpected way. They assist wounded soldiers as therapy animals.
Aftermath: Life Debt, the new novel by Chuck Wendig, is the gift that keeps on giving. First, it reestablished the life debt between Han Solo and Chewbacca, though in a slightly different way than the previous expanded universe. Then, it gives us the dirt on General Hux (his name is Armitage). Now, it has the most fantastic use for Ewoks that we could have conceived of. Thanks to iO9, we have the full story from the book. It's about a rebel soldier named Dade who loses his leg in battle and has it replaced with a prosthetic at a Rebellion hospital. Dade is then offered the use of a "therapy droid" to help him with his recuperation, but he's not particularly interested in that, so he's given an alternative rehab partner.
For what it's worth, Dade isn't interested in a therapy Ewok either. Apparently, they smell bad.
It's not uncommon for actual soldiers dealing with injuries to get therapy pets. Pets have a tendency to relax us, which can be a major win for a soldier suffering from PTSD. A therapy Ewok? Considering the grief that many fans give the creatures, if the citizens of the Star Wars universe feel the same way, it's unlikely a therapy Ewok would have the intended effect. Still, it's sort of perfect. You're in rehab, here's a cute furball to hang out with while you get better. Smell notwithstanding, what do they do? Do they sit on the couch with you while you watch TV like your dog or cat might? Ewoks are more intelligent and capable of language, that's just weird. It's like being handed a roommate to help with your rehab. Roommates are terrible. Roommates that smell bad are the worst.
Still, they apparently feel that they owe the Rebellion for kicking the Empire off their planet. It's nice that they volunteered to join the fight in some way. Are you interested in a therapy Ewok? Let us know what you would have it do for you in the comments.