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Hollywood and TV have been preparing us for years for how to handle things when it looks like the world will fall victim to an apocalypse of some kind. And while most of us will probably scramble around in alarmed panic, media mogul and CNN originator Ted Turner had a much more classy way to handle it, as he planned on having the video below be the last thing that his 24-hour news empire ever aired.
The video, which features what looks like a military band performing the classic tune “Nearer My God to Thee,” had previously been something of an urban legend over the years, among those who discuss such things. While the exact details behind its discovery are being kept quiet, according to Jalopnik, it was apparently being stored within the CNN databases under the heading “Turner Doomsday Video.” (We’ll assume the password for that file was “password.”)
The instructions tacked onto the video were fairly simple: “HFR (Hold for release) till end of the world confirmed.” If the world happens to end by having the core explode – presumably at the hands of some evil mastermind with a swell mustache – then Turner was probably banking on one dedicated family-less employee sticking around to handle the video-playing duties.
Of course, this shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone around Turner when he got CNN started, as he reportedly claimed then that they would play the National Anthem when the network launched, and that he wanted “Nearer My God to Thee” played when the network signed off for the last time. Of course, Turner has long since left his CNN duties behind, which means we’ll probably end up hearing Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball” when the world ends.
For those who think “Nearer My God to Thee” sounds familiar, but can’t quite place where it comes from, you might remember it from James Cameron’s Titanic, where the band played it as the ship was going down. This is apparently the only song that one should listen to when the most depressingly devastating thing possible is happening. Good to know.
The revolution may not be televised, but at least one reaction to the world coming to an end will be. Unless TVs of the future only accept resolutions 1080p or higher, that is.