Listen, Ted Lasso, we’re all excited for the return of your show for Season 4, but before I get too complimentary here, I need you to understand that not everything is all “biscuits” and barbecue while you film episodes in Kansas City this month. Not only did you decide it was okay to cancel my 9-year-old nephew’s final soccer practice of the summer, but you also disrupted my 11-year-old niece’s trip to her favorite boba tea shop in The Plaza. Come on, Ted! You’re supposed to love kids!
First, The Final Soccer Practice Of The Summer Got Canceled
When I heard from my nephew about his final practice getting canceled, I was simply devastated. My nephew is a sports nut! Not only can he rattle off baseball stats that would make any sabremetrician jealous, but he can’t get enough soccer, baseball, golf, basketball, and hockey in his life. My poor sister is forever locked into driving him from practice to practice all weekend, every weekend, and frankly, every day of the summer. Except last Thursday.
Sure, my sister was secretly grateful to get the break, but not my nephew. When I asked him how it felt to have his soccer practice canceled by a world-famous Premier League manager, he said,
I'm annoyed.
You see, Ted, my verbose nephew only wanted to play the sport you are so famous for coaching, and he was supposed to have not one, but two practices that day, as he pointed out,
Because if we had it on Thursday, I would have been able to have, well, six hours of soccer with soccer camp in the morning and soccer practice in the afternoon.
Instead, he got no soccer that day, because once you, Ted Lasso, insisted that the park be shut down for your little TV show, that afternoon, he decided he didn’t want to go in the morning, either. It’s truly heartbreaking. He was forced to spend the whole day at home with his big sister. Not ideal, Ted!
By the way, Coach Lasso, he doesn’t even watch your show! It’s because of the language, and not because he doesn't appreciate the show's wonderful humor, as does my whole family, but still! He’s boycotting now (unless my sister lets him watch), so there’s one viewer you won’t have when Season 4 is available with an Apple Plus subscription. Instead, he’ll try to sneak in episodes of another Apple TV+ hit, Stick without my sister noticing (again, language). Take that!
And That’s Not All Ted (If That Is Your Real Name)
If it wasn’t bad enough that you shut down an entire city park in Kansas City to film, according to my niece, your production also blocked entry into her favorite Boba tea shop in town. My niece is crazy about Boba tea (who can blame her), but over the weekend, as you and your friends made your hilarious hit show, she was forced to take the long way around to the entrance and enjoy some tea!
When I asked her how she felt about all the cameras and microphones getting in the way, she said,
It was actually pretty cool.
You’re breaking my heart, Ted. Kansas City loves you, I get it. It seems even my niece has gone to the dark side. That’s probably because she could still get her tea after a minor annoyance and got the chance to see a real Hollywood production for the first time, but to cancel a kids' soccer practice without even showing up to give one bit of your great advice? Next time, do better, Ted.
Go West Ham.
You must confirm your public display name before commenting
Please logout and then login again, you will then be prompted to enter your display name.
