TV Recap: Grey's Anatomy - Lay Your Hands On Me

Previously:

Bailey’s marriage is in trouble, and Derek and Rose started heating up.

Mer VO has been replaced by Bailey VO. Guys, I try to stay away from spoilers, but I know that this does not bode well for our dear Miranda.

Bailey VO: “In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth…and then God created man and it’s been downhill ever since.”

Derek and Sloan (just by the way, it’s been so long since I’ve seen this show that I actually had to look up Sloan’s name) are taking a romantic walk through the woods so Derek can talk about his Meredith/Rose conundrum. He’s also showing Sloan the view from the house he is finally going to have built.

We cut immediately to Mer and Derek in the kitchen where he’s showing her the plans and saying it’s her house too. So at this point, he’s just testing her. If she falls into his arms and cries, “Oh, Dr. Shepherd, a home of my own? Why, it’s just what I have always wanted! How can I ever thank you?” and dissolves into a puddle of tears and gratitude, then he’s going to grace her with his presence for a little while longer. However, if her reaction is a little more, “Dude, why don’t we put the blueprints and fabric swatches aside for a moment while I finish making my freakin’ omelet and you SLOW YOUR ROLL,” he’s going to be back to sucking face with the scrub nurse within the hour. Am I the only one who kind of thinks this guy is a jerk?

Anyway, it turns out Meredith is making omelets for Lexie, who is staying with them. Hey, did anybody guess that Meredith would be a comically bad cook? Of course you did.

At the hospital:

Rose and Derek make googly eyes at each other, but he tells her that hey can’t make out any more because he’s seeing Meredith. Rose says she understands, but doesn’t seem too concerned because apparently she knows what everybody else knows re: making out within the hour. Izzie tells Cristina she is over Cardio, which momentarily makes Cristina happy. Of course, Hahn immediately gives the patient to Alex, who is just wandering by.

Meanwhile, Callie is finding herself in an awkward situation with a mother whose son hasn’t been keeping her abreast of the important issues in his life. Her name is Mrs. O’Malley and she hasn’t heard that George and Callie have separated. In fact, she has been feverishly knitting unisex baby clothing ever since George told her they were “trying.”

Giving Callie a run for her money in the …Awkward category, is Izzie, who in the span of 20 seconds manages to not only babble to George’s mother that she broke up his marriage but that he also failed the intern exam. Oy. George comes by and Izzie scurries away with a horrified expression to leave George to do some explaining. George’s mom freaks out on him and says she raised him better than that and that he needs to apologize to their priest for being a bad Catholic. They later have a touching scene where he tells her he wants to be the guy that he used to be. The guy who gets babies named after him.

Patient Roundup:

Hahn’s heart patient, Elizabeth Archer, is a faith healer. She has an aortic dissection and needs surgery before the blood supply to her heart is cut off, but she won’t stay in bed long enough to get treatment. She’s been spending the morning wandering around the hospital healing other patients. Hahn is insistent that she immediately goes into surgery, but Elizabeth doesn’t want to do anything until her healing team arrives and she is walked through the procedure.

Bailey gets a call from Tucker just as she enters the emergency room and sees him wheeling in their baby on a gurney. “There was an accident,” Tucker says. Noooo! Don’t make Bailey sad! We come back from commercial and find out that a bookcase full of medical books fell on him. Bailey and Tucker spend a lot of time blaming each other for the accident. Oh Jesus. They’re looking at little George’s films and his stomach is in his chest, his heart is damaged and his colon could be punctured. It’s not looking good for little Bailey.

Surgery:

Bailey barges into the OR while Hahn is performing surgery. She says she has to be with her son and hold his hand. Hahn refuses to continue the surgery until Bailey leaves and in a rare moment of compassion, Cristina tells Bailey that she’ll hold his hand. Bailey leaves.

As much as I dislike Derek sometimes, some of the best Bailey scenes happen with him. He walks into an office, where Bailey is going over what she did before she left the house again and again in an attempt to remember if she closed the baby gate or not. Derek just keeps on quietly telling her that it’s okay, that things just happen. She breaks down, yelling that it’s not okay, that the world just doesn’t happen. She’s can’t have hurt her baby. He just takes her into his arms and calms her down. It’s heartbreaking.

Hahn and the Chief finish the surgery and it’s successful, although little Bailey still has fluid around his heart, so they’re not sure if he’ll be able to breathe on his own. Tucker and Bailey are alone with him, and they keep calling him Tuck, which I don’t really understand since she named the baby after George.

Showdown! After George lets it slip that Derek and Rose sucked face yesterday, Meredith confronts Derek. She accuses him of not wanting to be with her, but with someone who wants what he wants. Which, from my vantage point, seems pretty accurate. He basically tells her that this whole thing was a test (ugh) and that she failed. She says she’s not ready to build a dream house because she can’t trust him. Derek blah blahs about how he can’t do it anymore. Meredith: “Well neither can I.” God. Good for her.

Apparently the patients that Elizabeth has “healed” are doing really well, so even though Bailey doesn’t necessarily believe in it, she still brings her in to help her son. Oh, his eyes are taped shut! So sad! Lifehouse's "Broken" plays in the background. The rest of the Seattle Grace crew is clustered around staring, so Bailey goes out to tell them to leave. Just then, little Bailey starts choking on the breathing tube, which means that he can breathe on his own.

Alex takes Izzie to Elizabeth’s room since she’s a “bright yellow.” That basically means that she’s an optimist—the opposite of Alex, so she can help heal Elizabeth. He leaves the room and tells her, “Yang’s got nothing on you.”

Bailey VO: “As doctors, we know more about the human body now, than at any other point in our history. But the miracle of life itself…is still a mystery.”

George and Lexie check on Tuck (aka William George Bailey Jones), who is going to be fine. George asks Lexie if she wants to get an apartment with him and be roomies. Hahn and Sloan flirt a little bit, but she tells him it will never work because they work together. Derek asks Rose out to dinner. Well that’s a quick rebound from ending a relationship with the woman you wanted to marry. Ass. Now that their son is going to be okay, Tucker leaves the hospital to pack his bags and get a hotel room.

“The fact that we show up for each other in spite of our differences, no matter what we believe, is reason enough to keep believing.”

Well that’s it guys. No more Bailey until next year. Have fun with all the reality TV and game shows!