The Rock Will Steal Your Teeth

Hey guys, remember The Santa Clause? Remember how it was really popular with the kids - so popular it spawned two sequels? Well, don’t think that just because Tim Allen is old and the concept is played out that we’re seeing the end of it! Now The Rock is coming to our rescue, but instead of sullying childhood memories of Santa, he’s taking on another mythical creature—the Tooth Fairy.

The former wrestler, who is currently making bank by starring in kid-friendly movies, will play that tooth-stealing temptress, in a movie directed by Santa Clause 2 and 3 helmer Michael Lembeck (ohhh, so that explains it). The only plot detail from Variety is that The Rock—excuse me, Dwayne Johnson—will play an ordinary man enlisted to save the fairy kingdom.

I can see the pitch meeting now. “You know the poster for The Game Plan? With the little girl in the tutu? Well let’s put the tutu on The Rock! Yeah, the joke writes itself!” Not that I don’t trust this movie to be kind of cute and make a bascrillion dollars, but come on guys. Even eight-year-olds will know this is a Santa Clause knockoff. And given the diminishing returns on the sequels to that movie, a knockoff is pretty much the worst thing imaginable.

Katey Rich

Staff Writer at CinemaBlend