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Ben Stiller in Tropic Thunder

Come down the rabbit hole of this random F9 rumor with me. Will Ben Stiller really be in Fast and Furious 9? That's the rumor now spreading, based on wafer thin information. But this is the Fast and Furious franchise. Things don't have to make sense to be true, so until someone says no, my mind will hope yessss. And if someone does say no, we trend #JusticeForBen until they cast him anyway.

After all, Fast and Furious 9 is titled F9 like the keyboard button. The first trailer was revealed after a ludicrously over-the-top concert in Miami. One of the film's stars admitted F9 completely defies the laws of physics. And one of the movie's other stars had his character mysteriously reappear after death. So, sure. I am open to the idea that Ben Stiller is in F9. It's not like the Zoolander star doesn't have a sense of humor about over-the-top action movies. Tropic Thunder says hi.

The Ben Stiller rumor comes from Page Six in a report that's literally two paragraphs long. It was posted February 29, but it took a day for people to catch on and scratch their heads over it. I can believe it in theory. It's not that weird to have Ben Stiller show up in a movie. I'm just not sure why it's presented with so little information and presented so long after the movie finished filming.

Here's all we know so far: Page Six posted that the site was told Ben Stiller would have a role in F9. In addition, Stiller was "due to begin shooting scenes for F9 soon."

Fast and Furious 9's extremely long -- record-length for Vin Diesel -- shoot wrapped principal photography in November 2019. The movie comes out in May 2020. I guess Ben Stiller could be part of reshoots, or just be part of something that only takes a day or two.

So if Ben Stiller is involved, he must be doing a last-minute thing. If his appearance is true, I hope it wasn't supposed to be a surprise cameo, like Ryan Reynolds' role in the Fast and Furious spinoff Hobbs & Shaw. If so, oops! The cat's is out of the bag.

(I'd love it if Ben Stiller filmed a wild supporting role in the vein of Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder. My god that was a masterpiece.)

Don't be surprised if someone shoots down this Ben Stiller rumor. But also, don't shoot me if he does show up in a cameo and you wish it had been a surprise. I'm just sharing what was reported, and I have no idea where Page Six heard what it heard. Maybe John Cena is out there tellin' tales, but I doubt he'd risk losing the respect of the Fast and Furious family.

With or without Ben Stiller, F9 is racing into theaters on May 22, 2020, starring Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, Tyrese Gibson, Jordana Brewster, Ludacris Bridges, Nathalie Emmanuel, Helen Mirren, Charlize Theron, Sung Kang, Lucas Black, and John Cena.

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