Amanda Bynes Claims Cop Slapped Her Vagina

Amanda Bynes typically has a different take on her personal life than members of the media reporting stories about her, but I’m not sure the two accounts have ever differed more than those concerning her recent arrest. In fact, her version of events doesn’t involve any drugs but does include a vagina slap.

If members of the media and the police reports they’re going off are to be believed, a staff member called police on Bynes Thursday night after she was spotted smoking a joint inside the lobby of her luxury apartment building. After police arrived and knocked on her apartment door, officers allegedly detected a strong odor of marijuana and bizarrely, watched Bynes grab a bong and heave it out her 36th floor window. The whole account sounds pretty damning, but Bynes says it’s all fabrications.

Here’s how she explained what happened on Twitter earlier today…

”Don't believe the reports about me being arrested. It's all lies. I was sexually harassed by one of the cops the night before last which is who then arrested me. He lied and said I threw a bong out the window when I opened the window for fresh air. Hilarious. He slapped my vagina. Sexual harassment. Big deal. I then called the cops on him. He handcuffed me, which I resisted, quite unlike any of the reports stated. Then I was sent to a mental hospital. Offensive. I kept asking for my lawyer but they wouldn't let me. The cops were creepy. The cop sexually harassed me, they found no pot on me or bong outside my window. That's why the judge let me go. Don't believe any reports.”

Over the past year or so, Bynes’ mental health has been questioned on a pretty regular basis. This whole incident is a good indication of why. Maybe something shady happened with this cop. Maybe it didn’t. Either way, it’s the latest of what feels like more than a dozen times that she’s assessed a situation very differently than police officers, members of the media, gym employees and/ or landlords.

We’ll keep you updated on Bynes’ case as it winds its way through the court system. Expect a whole lot more drama before it’s over.

Mack Rawden
Editor In Chief

Enthusiastic about Clue, case-of-the-week mysteries, the NBA and cookies at Disney World. Less enthusiastic about the pricing structure of cable, loud noises and Tuesdays.