Arguably the most high-profile upcoming horror TV show, at least based purely on its own television legacy, is FX’s American Horror Story 13. (Since Carrie and Crystal Lake stem from literary and cinematic sources.) The latest season is truly the most all-star of them all, featuring the largest batch of cast members and characters in franchise history, as well as the most dangerous antagonist to date. I cannot WAIT, and the long road to the first trailer has been pure agony. Or had been.
American Horror Story 13’s first trailer did indeed arrive, and thankfully delivered all the kooky, spooky, wicked, icky madness that I desired. Plus, it’s easy to see how the trailer is still only the tip of the iceberg as far as what’s actually going to play out. (Which is to say, I still have no real idea of what to expect, but I know I’ll be downright gleeful the whole time.) Now join me in nerding out over some of these trailer moments and reveals.
John Waters And Jessica Lange Being All Dark And Devious
John Waters in American Horror Story is a long-held dream of mine, and I was ever so slightly worried that his character would go against type. Not the case whatsoever, thank you jeebus, and he is just so delightfully John Waters each time he's on screen. To have him paired up with Jessica Lange even for a moment is an unadulturated treasur-r-r-re. Then to later see him bloody and cackling while getting stabby? You did it, AHS. You've reached peak yourself.
Sarah Paulson Is Shockingly Bringing Double Feature's Mamie Eisenhower Back
Not for a single second did I think Sarah Paulson's return to the franchise would include a reprisal of First Lady Mamie Eisenhower, who was married to Neal McDonough's POTUS Dwight D. in AHS: Double Feature. Especially considering the way her story...ends. I'm not even sure what to think about the way she shows up in the trailer, either, in rapid succession with others like the same season's Tuberculosis Karen. What's happening there?
I'm A Total Sucker For Evan Peters' James Patrick March
I'm always going to be wowed on some level by Evan Peters in Mr. March mode. The throwback accent, cadence and characterization are already a combined hoot, and then add all of his other quirks into the mix? I realize it's probably better in small doses, but give me ten doses at once just to be sure.
Myrtle Snow In The House (Or On The Street)!
Set photos alluded to retired actress Frances Conroy making a brief return to the screen to reprise the great Myrtle Snow, but I don't recall seeing it officially confirmed anywhere until this shot, where Myrtle's signature red hair cannot be mistaken. The shot also confirms new coven members portrayed by Avantika and Alex Consani. But sadly no Misty Day, despite all hopes.
Twisty Will Go Ham On Other Clowns
Put Twisty in any scenario and I'm watching, but there's something morbidly whimsical about the thought of him attacking a group of real clowns in John Carroll Lynch's return for AHS 13. Hopefully he becomes a pro wrestler as well.
That Airplane Diaster
In a scene that looks like it would come from 9-1-1 instead of American Horror Story, we see a whole wall of an airplane cabin stripped away in mid-flight. Unless the trailer is tricking us, it appears to be the flight with the "Thirteen" group led by Madelaine Pestch's character Kira. What's that all about? Maybe a Final Destination nod?
Is That A For-Real Demon?
This appears to be the same wrinkled old creature that appears earlier in the trailer getting its back washed. I'm not sure if this creature is what's in the penthouse that Joey Pollari's Ben DeSoto is looking after, or where it came from. But I like it. I'd theorized about Satan himself being the season's big bad, and while this beast isn't on that level, it does give off major demonic vibes.
I might as well also throw the idea out there that this could be a newly modified version of the Infantata. Because I cannot have this many American Horror Story returns without the Infantata also getting time to shine.
The only good thing about AHS 13's trailer being released so late is that we don't have long at all to wait for the season to start up. Find all your favorite characters when the season debuts on FX on Thursday, September 24, at 9:00 p.m. ET.
