I know Friends is one of the best sitcoms of all time because I’ve returned to it time and time again throughout my life. Like, I couldn’t count on both hands how many times I’ve seen many of the episodes, and I’ve definitely watched it all the way through a few times. It’s been a long time since I went back to the iconic series, but when I got my wisdom teeth out last week, I ended up throwing on the show for some brainless entertainment, and something new came up. Rachel really had me fuming!
Now, I know there are Rachel haters out there, but in the past I’ve thought of Ross as the worst and Monica as my second least favorite. This time I found myself practically yelling at my TV screen over what Rachel does more than anyone, and remembering a bunch of other instances where she was super questionable. I've got to talk about it. (But remember, I’m talking about TV characters here, so it’s really not that serious).
The One Where She Tries To Sabotage Ross’s Relationship
The first instance that really got my blood boiling was in Season 2, Episode 4. At this point, we know that Ross had a long-time crush on Rachel – he even told her earlier as I had recalled. When they don't end up together in Season 1, Ross meets a nice gal named Julie. Rachel gets super jealous about Ross being with her. When she hears that Ross and Julie are about to have sex for the first time, she sabotages the whole thing by making Julie talk all night while everyone is hanging out together.
Sure, it hurts to see someone you like get into a relationship with someone else, but talk about an incredibly passive-aggressive way to deal with it. She’s not only being a horrible friend to Ross, but to all her other friends who she drags down with her. Ross has just gone through a divorce at this point and communicated his interest to her multiple times before he got with Julie, so it feels super unfair. But this is just one of many things Rachel does.
The One Where She Goes Out With Monica's Big Crush
A few episodes later, Friends has a two-part Super Bowl episode where they cross paths with Jean-Claude Van Damme (yes, the actor as himself). Upon seeing the action star, Monica confesses her big crush on him, and Rachel suggests he go up to talk to him. When she protests, she decides to confront him for her (which Monica doesn’t want). Van Damme starts flirting with Rachel because she’s beautiful, of course. Rather than shutting it down, she totally goes for it. Before she knows it, she’s going on a date with the guy. The nerve of Rachel! I don’t have to tell most of y’all how many girl codes this breaks, but it’s a lot.
The One When She Convinces Bonnie To Shave Her Head
Fast forward to the end of Season 3, when Ross is dating Bonnie. Phoebe sets them up, but only after asking Rachel if it’d be OK if she does. Rachel only says yes because she believes Bonnie to be bald, and knows Ross won’t like it. To her surprise, she’s got a full head of hair. So, Rachel decides to convince Bonnie to shave her head because she liked it that way, and she listens. Yes, once again we see Rachel being passive-aggressive toward someone whom she apparently loves, and probably once thought of as the love of her life, AND is actually friends with. This behavior feels more like bullying than friendship to me.
The One Where She Writes Ross An 18-Page Letter
In the same episode, Ross and Rachel decide to get back together after her sabotage and manipulation tactics apparently work. But after all that, she doesn’t want to talk things out with her ex before taking him back, for some reason. Instead, she gives him an 18-page letter that she wrote to read through, and she wants him to read it at 5:30 a.m. We don’t know the exact contents of the letter, but apparently it asks Ross to take all the blame for their failed relationship. While I totally agree that Ross made some big mistakes, especially with the cheating, I find this to be a pretty ridiculous way to try to repair a relationship. But, hey, sometimes Friends episodes can be ridiculous.
The One Where She Steals Monica’s Thunder
Then there’s the Season 7 premiere when Monica gets engaged. Not too long after Chandler pops the question, Rachel comes on to Ross (who are no longer together, again), and they end up making out in the hallway. Soon all the friends are chatting about what this means for Ross and Rachel rather than focusing on Chandler and Monica’s big milestone.
I think it understandably bothers Monica and brings up some past instances where she “stole her thunder." While you can argue Rachel didn’t know she would cause Monica so much stress, I think Rachel’s actions toward Ross were driven by her own insecurities that came up when she saw her friend engaged. Just be happy for your bestie and don’t kiss your ex and her brother for one day, girl! It’s not that hard.
The One Where She Dates Joey To Get Back At Ross
The last one I’ll bring up is something from the latter part of the show that still breaks my heart. Remember when Rachel decided to date Joey in order to get back at Ross? This is when Ross gets with Charlie, and Rachel essentially decides to get back at him by going out with Joey. I think it’s super obvious from Season 8 on that Joey has a crush on Rachel, and yet, I feel like she ignores his feelings and manufactures her own in order to feel better about herself. Ugh, I'll never unsee all of this.
I have one more point to make here. I think one of the reasons why I’m always returning to Friends with my HBO Max subscription is because all the friends feel human and flawed. The show just wouldn’t be entertaining if everyone reacted well to every situation. But, wow I can't believe I did not realize before all the wild choices Rachel made on the show before!
