Breaking Bad is almost over, but you know what's the best way to keep the show alive? Swag! Specifically handcrafted, lovingly made swag from the geniuses at Etsy, who are churning out Breaking Bad-themed stuff that's staggering both in its creativity and, sometimes, its weirdness. Starting with the most normal stuff and building up to some of the biggest oddities, here are the highlights, from a Gale Boetticher notebook to a Jesse Pinkman Hello Kitty with the power to give you nightmares.
Let's start with the easiest way to state your fandom: the T-shirt. But we're not going to allow you to just sport a standard shirt with the Breaking Bad logo or a Heisenberg. How about a deeper cut, like a nod to Jesse's first nickname and criminal enterprise?
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Or, slightly less obscure, the logo from all the barrels of chemicals that Lydia procures for our cooks?
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Of course, there are some classics that have to be recognized, and at least these Pollos Hermanos and Vamonos Pest shirts have appropriately weathered looks, as if they've been worn a few time by one of Gus's underlings or Todd on a relaxing Nazi weekend.
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If you're not into displaying your TV loyalties out and about in the world, how about finding a way to do it inside your home? This abstract rendition of the evolution is pretty sweet, and up-to-date with the inclusion of New Hampshire resident Mr. Lambert:
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There are a million things on the Internet with "Better Call Saul" emblazoned on it, but this is one of the best designed. As a bonus, it'll still be relevant thanks to the imminent spinoff.
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Or how about this dynamic, and mildly terrifying, representation of the show's central badasses (yes, Skyler totally qualifies as a badass):
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There are a million options for showing off the Heisenberg sketch, but I'm into the simplicity of this card decal, which could even be mistaken for one of those dopey stick-figure families from a distance:
Super deep cut here for those who pay attention to costume design: remember how, when Skyler went back to work for Ted Beneke, she started wearing these wide silver bracelets? You might not remember, but she totally did, and you can buy those bracelets (she wore 2 at a time) for yourself. Subtlest Breaking Bad homage ever!
Buy Say you work in an office that's somehow chill enough that you can honor your love for a show about cooking meth. How do you do it? Start with these quote magnets:
If you get away with the profanity there, move on to these stamped pencils:
And finally, my favorite of the bunch-- a notebook inscribed by Gale Boetticher himself. Bonus points if your initials are W.W.
Buy Now let's get to the actual business at hand-- the Breaking Bad finale party you're hosting, or maybe the Breaking Bad-themed Halloween party if you need some extra time. There are some crucial elements to have on hand, starting with rock candy meth, of course:
And a koozie to make your average beer look like a barrel full of illicit chemicals:
And a way to label all that perfectly on-theme food you've prepared. It's OK, you can get the green beans from the deli counter at Albertson's and it'll be even more on theme.
To keep everyone entertained while they wait for the show to start, hand out this word find:
Or if you want to knock out all your party supply shopping in one fell swoop-- the bundle is a serious deal!
Buy OK now we're getting into the stuff that's only for some very specific fans. But hey, if you're that kind of fan, it's a gold mine! Got an aspiring Gale-style poet who wants to limit their oeuvre to the meth industry and the Albuquerque area?
How about someone who enjoys a drug a little less illicit than meth-- hey, we're not judging.
When you just can't pick which icon of Breaking Bad you want to wear on your body...
Perfect for hanging on the outside of your RV or anywhere that the DEA can't bother you.
Terrify your party guests and remind them that the real danger has already invited them inside.
Buy If you're still resolutely Team Walt, no matter what happens on Sunday, here's the best way to view your hero.
Why just have a figurine of the RV when you can crash it inside real plant life?
You'd better believe there are army man figurines for all our favorite characters, but Saul's might be the most unlikely and hilarious.
The official AMC store sells a Heisenberg name necklace, but this one gets more inventive with the official logo, and it's a good retort to anyone who gives you trouble.
For the friend who, like Hank, still isn't over what happened in El Paso.
Maybe the most obscure Breaking Bad reference to be turned into swag, and an excellent way to boss your own spouse around.
Buy Remember the good old days, when Walt would wear a tie to work and then spend his weekends out in the desert in the RV with Jesse.
Or you can give the RV its proper name, and toast to its memory, with the Crystal Ship glass.
Don't forget the coasters to go underneath that glass! You are drinking Schraderbrau, right?
No vanity plate can possibly beat this one, so you may as well buy it now.
For the high school chemistry teacher who wants to seem straightforward on the outside, but has a deep dark secret… about his addiction to Breaking Bad.
No, not that kind of cooking, Marie! Now where's my meatloaf?
Buy So now it's time for the truly strange stuff. Brace yourselves!
Sure, Saul did hand Jesse a phone with a Hello Kitty cover. But did that really call for this half-Heisenberg, half-Walt nightmare?
At least this Jesse version includes the Hello Kitty phone itself… but the sight of a Hello Kitty with a goatee is still something I never, ever needed.
Gus Fring's half blown-off face is one of the most grisly images that's ever been on the show, so I guess it's appropriate that it inspired the grisliest fan art… but who really wants this in their house?
Or to wear around their neck!?!?!?!
These sacred candles resemble the ones in the shrine that the Cousins crawl toward in the Season 3 opener, along with the ones you can find in just about any bodega in New York… but Walt and Jesse as saints is enough to make any good Catholic's skin crawl.
Do not turn your babies into Breaking Bad memorabilia. Just do not.
