There’s perhaps nothing more relatable than having a neighbor you don’t like. Just ask Stephen Amell. The Arrow star took to social media this week to discuss issues he’s been having with the woman next door. Much less relatable, however, is those issues getting so bad they lead to one neighbor pooping on the other’s roof. You can ask Stephen Amell about that too.
The actor has apparently been feuding with the neighbor in question for three years over what he claims is “illegal construction.” Over Memorial Day, there was apparently some kind of altercation between Amell’s wife Cass and the mystery woman, and the next day, the neighbor allegedly snuck onto their property, climbed onto the roof and took a shit. I mean, what can you even say at that point? Check out the social media post, which warning, contains a picture of said shit.
So, I’m just gonna be completely honest here. There’s a battle going on in my mind right now about how to proceed. There’s part of me that just wants to say, “Yup, that sucks” and move on. There’s another part of me that wants to really dig into this situation and discuss the specifics. I think I’m gonna go with the specifics. So, if you don’t want to read a graphic discussion about what may or may not have happened here, just bail on this article. I’ll understand.
And for those of us who are still around, let’s go. So, my main question here, first, is whether we’re 100% confident this is her shit. Does she have a dog? Is it possible this is dog poop? If so, this is obviously still gross and perhaps the biggest non-violent middle finger you can give a neighbor, but people do play pranks with dog poop. Just ask Billy Madison.
Now, if this is human shit, then the obvious question is whether the woman first pooped in a bag, then snuck onto the roof and dumped out the contents of the bag or whether she dropped her pants and pooped straight on the roof. For comedy sake, you gotta hope she pooped straight onto the roof. Can you even imagine what that must feel like emotionally? Have you ever peed behind a tree while you’re hiking or walking home drunk? Think about those feelings and multiply them exponentially. What would you even say if you got caught?
Now, there’s a final possibility here that has to at least be acknowledged. It’s possible Stephen Amell (or his wife) pooped on their own roof and took to social media either as a prank or as a way to gain leverage in this ongoing feud with the neighbor. I really don’t think that’s the case here. That would be some next level Pink Flamingos super villain shit, but since we’re looking at all the angles, that has to at least be acknowledged.
Long story short, there are better ways to solve problems than by pooping on someone’s roof. If you’re currently in a dispute with one of your neighbors, I’d advise you consider any other non-violent methods first. That being said, we’re just gonna have to wait and see how this one plays out. There’s always a chance this is just an initial step in a larger scheme this neighbor may have.
Enthusiastic about Clue, case-of-the-week mysteries, the NBA and cookies at Disney World. Less enthusiastic about the pricing structure of cable, loud noises and Tuesdays.
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