The Goonies 2: Three Possible Storylines We'd Actually Want To See
The Goonies remains one of my earliest cinematic obsessions. I worshipped Richard Donner’s spunky, messy kids-on-an-adventure fantasy. I bought an Army bomber jacket that looked like Data’s and filled the pockets with "Booby traps." I begged my parents to vacation in Oregon, convinced I could stumble on a labyrinth of underground tunnels and caves. It was pretty unhealthy for a while.
So news that Richard Donner, Steven Spielberg and the entire Goonies clan might want to get the treasure-hunting band back together for The Goonies 2 nearly 30 years later conjures this strange concoction of excitement, nostalgia and dread. Sure, we want to see where The Goonies 2 might go, especially if – as Donner has said – Spielberg came up with the idea of a story. But do we want to see 42-year-old Corey Feldman swinging from the mast of a new pirate ship, while 46-year-old Josh Brolin tries to put the moves on 47-year-old Kerri Green? Or has the ship sailed?
We’re not giving up on The Goonies 2, because Goonies – as you know – never say die. So if this sequel is happening, here are three potential plotlines we can get behind:
The Goonie KidsFor some reason, this just feels like the direction that the inevitable sequel, The Goonies 2, will go. Richard Donner – or whomever directs – will come up with a script catching up with the original characters 30 years after the adventures on that fateful afternoon. Only now, they’ll be parents, raising their own little Goon Dock rejects. Slash Film notes that early drafts of a The Goonies 2 script involved the children of Mikey (Sean Astin) and Brand (Josh Brolin), and would follow them on a new journey. Hopefully, this new script would tap into the wonderment and adventure of the first movie, reminding audiences that ‘80s movies had this fantastic, unique sense of empowerment for kids that’s missing in movie theaters these days.
But will we be able to watch these new kids without comparing them to the original cast? Do we want to get the Goonies cast back together, then relegate them to the background roles of parents. Because grownup don’t belong in a Goonies adventure. This is our time, down here. Our time! But the news that Steven Spielberg came up with the storyline for The Goonies 2 means that the sequel likely will be family-friendly… and that likely means the further adventures of the Goonies families – kids and all. If they wanted to branch out in some crazy directions, though, we have better ideas.
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